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Justin Transue

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ALL IN A DAY'S WORKRATE
Review of "WWF SmackDown!"

Hey, hey. Sorry that there was no Tuesday review this week but I was busy playing the 'cause for this column, WWF Smackdown!. It seems that I am both desperate for a new WWF videogame and therefore unable to take this game back, and that THQ's workrate went from being Misawa-like for "Wrestlemania 2000" for N64 to being Rocky-like(not Balboa, MAIVIA) for us unlucky playstation owners that for once would like a wrestling game like those N64 jerks get. Anyhow, let's break this suminabitch down.

Graphics: All I hear is, and thought that I knew, is that THQ does graphics for wrestling games, 10x better than we had gotten from Acclaim...well they jipped us this time. This game completely pales in comparison to the graphical beauty known as "Wrestlemania 2000". I have been using HHH and half the time he is either facing the wrong way with his neck unnaturally bent around to look at my opponent, or he is doing the forward and sideways moonwalk, in real life that moonwalk may be hella cool, but please leave it out my videogames. Also when the game does a quick "Cut Angle" it comes back to normal view VERY awkwardly. I'll slam Matt Hardy in one corner in a quick "Cut angle" and then when the camera pans out again will be on the other side of the ring walking aound....WTF?? The entrance movies, although they look great its kinda cheesy. I am kinda dissapointed with the entrances, I have come to expect much more.
Out of 5 Stars: ***

Sound: The themes sound great. After all this is Sony CD quality sound, not cartridge based MIDI. There is no actual commentary in the game though and thats something THQ is notorious for not doing. The intro song of Smackdown! has always been kinda shitty in my opinion and it got on my nerves realy quick during the game. During the actual game play there are some alright songs, but none that make you wanna kick you opponrnts ass any more than normal.
Out of 5 Stars: ***

Control: This is my BIGGEST beef. Everyone knows THQ control is superb right? Once again, they pee on playstation owners because this is horrid. First off WHY THE FUCK CAN'T I PICK UP A WEAPON??? I have been playing videogames longer than I can remember and I tried EVERY DAMN button scheme and combonation I could think of.....to no avail! Secondly this whole 'you do stronger moves when the opponent is groggy' shit is just that, shit. First off the comp. rarely gets groggy even when you've been knockin' his candy ass around for the most part of a match! Secondly, how come the computer can a finisher just about whenever they please? Stupid.
Out of 5 Stars: **

Create-a-player: This is the WORST create-a-player I have ever seen. All the options are goofy as hell, the finishers are fucking queer. Mine is a Sambo Slam, which I admit is one of my fav. moves in true life but in a video game i'd like to kick a little more ass. How come WM2k had that nifty preview thing for everything under the sun, and we don't get it? If we do get one,I couldn't figure out how to get it. How come, they had a billion more moves? How come this game ABSOLUTELY SUCKS? Sorry, that was bulding up for a while. I do like how you get to pick the type of matches you are good at, and your characters logic, grappling style, and point variant thing for the different skill areas. Though they will need some fine tuning they were well done.
Out of 5 Stars:***1/2

Ingenuity: THIS is the one thing that keeps me from trading this game in. This game really does bring a lot of new options and ideas to the table that were never before seen. The "I Quit" match where you have to pick up a mic and put in your opp.'s face and manually ask him if he quits is a hella cool idea(unfortunately, they DONT TELL US HOW TO PICK ANYTHING UP!). The "Guest Referee" is a GREAT idea too, and since, I own a multi-tap I see a lot of fights starting over this. the ref can either pick a fight with the wrestlers or he can count fast, slow, or not at all; it's up to him.The career mode is cool too. So far in preseason, the 8th ranked Ken Shamrock kicked my 37th ranked ass on my first Raw is War appearance of my try-out. Then backstage he gave me some advice on how not to be such a pussy in the ring, or something to that effect. It really is quite cool and I can't wait to have a good 10-15 year career.
Out of 5 Stars: ****1/2

Random Nitpicking: In the options you have a choice of K.O. and Submission being on or off. Personally I love submissions, but seeing how this is wrestling not boxing, I hate knockouts. So I honestly just turn them both off. You get knocked out SOOOOOO easily that it isn't worth it. I mean Al Snow knocked out my Steve Austin in about 5 minutes with a Snow Plow, not a pin mind you, a KNOCK OUT! That is too gay. Also, in case THQ reaads my column(and pigs fly during the cold days of hell), Acclaim had goofy AND....AAAAAAANNDDDD normal body parts and heads and character design options. If you are going to rip them off at least do it right. Do your honestly think the majority of wrestling fans are goin to be happy that their videogame likeness is going to look like a swat team/samurai/Y2J/All-American/cross dressing clown? I hope not. Gone are the oppurtunities to create other federations wrestlers and put them in the game.
-Not a star category

Final Analysis: Now that I ripped THQ and this game a new asshole I got to admit that the games ingenuity will most likely keep me from taking the game back and keep me playing it for a good while. In closing I say this: If you own "Wrestlemania 2000", rent this game, do't waste your money paying for this sorry imitation. And if you are a playstation owner absolutly dieing for a new wrestling game, go buy "ECW Hardcore Revolution". I haven't even pleayed that yet, but just by the fact that you get to play with ECW characters and it's made by Acclaim(who serves us PSX owners loads better then THQ) who has a good history(not stellar, but good) of wrestling games for PSX, I already know it's overall a better game than what those assholes at THQ gave us in the form of WWF Smackdown!. It is a shame too, because WM2k on N64 is the best wrestling game ever made; and it's by THE SAME COMPANY!
Overall Star Average: ***1/5

Thats all for today folks. I will see you Friday or Saturday with a Week in Review column. Peace to all my freaks and all my hoochees, all my workrate freaks; keep your head up and keep on buying those Japanese tapes! Write me if ya get the urge.

BenoitJericho@Yahoo.com

Until We Meet Again.........

Justin Transue
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Guest column text copyright (C) 2000 by the individual author and used with permission