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Jerry Root

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RETURN OF THE BRIDE OF THE SON OF THE MAT POTATO

I was reading Gregg's column and he made mention of Vampiro getting away from so may Undertaker things.

My first thought was, "Yeah, but that would force Russo to stop ripping off angles".

My second thought was "Man, lighten up a bit, OK?"

Then I got to thinking about it. How many angles are there in wrestling, anyway? I mean, really. Think about it. Most angles are either direct rip-offs of other angles, variations on other angles, or just downright recycled angles.

So, I thought I'd try to make a list of the angles that I am personally acquainted with. This list is in no means all inclusive, nor is it meant to be.

Angle 1 - The tag team splits and feuds. This one is so old it has a beard on it. The problem is that it just keeps getting repeated with more frequency and a shorter interval between the partners feuding. Every time I see a tag team now the first thing that comes to mind is "how long before the inevitable".

Angle 1a - One spouse turns on the other. Not quite as old as Angle 1, but still growing to the "cliché" level. I honestly can't remember the first time I saw this, but it's happening almost as frequently as angle 1.

Angle 2 - The totally unstoppable heel. Generally the heel in this case feels no pain, can't be stopped, and cheats like hell. My first recollection of this was the Original Sheik. He would go into a "trance" in his corner prior to the match and then he was allegedly impervious to pain. Nothing gets a crowd riled up quite like this. Every fed needs one so that angle 3 can come into play.

Angle 3 - The totally dominant face. AKA the superhero. Always plays clean, and is on the inevitable collision course with the unstoppable heel. Generally this is caused by the UH doing something dastardly to one of the faces friends.

Angle 4 - The "best friend turn". Have you noticed how many wrestlers have come in as "a friend of Hogan", and then ended up turning on him? It got to the point that I would see somebody aligned with Hogan and wondered to myself how long it was going to take this guy to get "tired of Hogan's crap" and make the turn.

Angle 5 - The sexy wrestler. This started way back. Does the name "Gorgeous George" mean anything to you, aside from Randy Savage's valet? Every man thinks he's irresistible to women. And after all, isn't it every boys dream to have beautiful women hanging all over them?

Angle 5a - The wrestler who brings a bevy of babes to the ring with him. (See Godfather's Ho train, et al.)

Angle 6 - The "nasty foreigner". This angle is not as popular as it was, but look for it to return. You never know who we'll be at odds with next, and that will be where this one will come from. Then again, it could be Canada again.

I'm sure there are others, as I said in the opening. However, as you can see, there are really no new angles under the sun. Even the "Outsiders" or the n.W.o. were all just imitations of what has gone before.

However, there are ways to recycle an angle without it being a carbon copy. But that takes creativity.

Jerry Root
[slash] wrestling

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