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Jerry Root

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THE MAT POTATO

I very rarely read the tv listings in the paper as they are generally worse than useless. Instead, I rely on the on-screen listings (thank you, digital cable).

However something caught my eye this evening as I was scanning the paper. Under the USA channel the listings for RAW showed "Scheduled: how will The Rock get to Wrestlemania?" for the first hour, and "Schedules: who runs the WWF? Steph or Shane?".

Interesting.

Then, I did something that I haven't had the opportunity to do for quite some time. I got up early and managed to catch the last match of the first hour, plus the entire second hour of the show.

Was I entertained?

Yes, for the most part.

However there were a few things that bothered me. Like this continual "booking on the fly" crap that allegedly takes place. It wasn't that long ago that wrestlers would complain when there was a "last minute substitution" and they would face an opponent that they "hadn't had a chance to prepare for".

Now we're expected to believe that HHH/Steph and/or Shane are using the "Bischoff magic 8-ball booking aid" (tm Scoopthis.com).

While we're on the subject of trying to sell an angle, I missed those "Damned Dudlyzzzz" putting Mae (I'm no longer) Young through a table. Or at least that's what we're supposed to believe. Well here's a hint. Next time you're trying to sell the notion that Mae Young went noggin first through the wood, don't show the angle that clearly shows Bubbah-Ray's big ass going through the table, OK?

Speaking of big asses, what that shot of Rikishi Phatu's ass really necessary? I mean, really?

Did I just time warp in or something? I mean, when did Dean Malenko actually develop a personality? I have watched him for some time, and the impression I always got was that of the stoic worker, going in, doing his thing, and then leaving. (Sort of like Steve Blackman is now). I distinctly heard him tell the ref to "get out of the way" in his match. Hmm. And people say Malenko has no mic skills.

Get better, Eddie. Your talent is being sadly wasted as the distraction. I can't wait for the frog-splash.

Speaking of wastes, can somebody tell me what Terri's function is, other than giving cheap flashes, thus driving pre-pubescent boys, and Lawler, nutso? Please don't tell me this is heading to an Edge/Christian break-up. This is strictly wrestling cliché 47. You know the one, tag team splits up over a woman. Don't go there, please.

I must say that the Rock/Benoit cage match was great. Of course, it always points up the flaws in booking (Rock is tied up in the ropes, why does Benoit see the need to stall and kick him a couple of times? If it was me, I'd be making a beeline for the top.)

Enough of this. CRZ does a killer recap and there is no way I can compete with either him or Hyatte, so I won't even try. I'll just content myself with my own musings and leave the recaps to the professionals.

One parting shot. The new Chef Boyardee commercial featuring Foley, is this just to keep him in the wrestling audience's mind so they can bring him back in a week or two? The king touched on it briefly after the commercial, that's what brought it to mind.

Wherever Mick is recuperating, I hope he is enjoying himself and giving his kids the attention they deserve. And thank you to the Foley family for sharing their father/husband with us.

Jerry Root
[slash] wrestling

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