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Jerry Root

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THE MAT POTATO II
French Fries

Back again with some random thoughts that have been nagging me. I was sorely tempted to write this yesterday but thought I'd let it ferment for another day to see if it made a difference. No real way of telling as I didn't write it yesterday, so there's no real way to compare now, is there. So, why even bring it up? Eh! Hey, we all have to start somewhere, don't we?

Speaking of starting somewhere, how'd you like to have been a fly on the wall at the booking meeting for the Rumble? I'd love to know whose idea it was to have Mae (Forever) Young show off her basset hounds. It must have been great.

Admit it. Most people remember the previous ppv when Ernest Miller (Thanks CRZ.) exposed herself. Now I know that was on my mind as I pondered ordering the rumble. Man, talk about a swerve! Whoever came up with that one deserves a slammy! So does Mae Young for having the chutzpa (I do hope I spelled that word right, my yiddish is terrible), to actually come through with it! Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant!

Does anybody remember a few years ago when the WWF was getting it's collective buttski kicked in the ratings and the big "Hey, ratings don't matter" controversy. (Vinny Mac said they don't matter while Uncle Eric was busy gloating about how he was kicking WWF around, etc.) My, how the worm has turned.

OK, now, Nitro goes back to 2 hours, Russo (aka, Wile E. Coyote, Super Genius), wants to go head to head with Raw, but it's decided to have one hour unopposed and give up the final hour to RAW. Now, using the chart that CRZ was nice enough to give us, we see that during the unopposed hours, Nitro did 3.4, up to 3.8. However, as soon as Raw comes on, the number drops off the table to 2.5! Raw starts out with 6.5, and goes all the way up to 7.5 at the end.

Still feel like going head to head there guys?

The booking committee has changed, and I can't really say that it's better, but I have to admit that after reading the results, at least Nitro had clean finishes! I don't think there was a clean win the entire RAW! Hey, damnit, what happened to clean finishes!

I remember when the 4 Horsemen first started off and all their wins were tainted, run-ins were the norm, etc. I hated it then, because there was no clean finish, no closure. There will come a time that the fans get tired of no pay-off and will go elsewhere.

What's old is new again. Remember how everybody waxes nostalgic about how in the "good old days" the faces were clearly defined, and the heels were readily recognizable. The faces were the scientific wrestlers and the heels were the ones who cheated mercilessly ("Win if you can, lose if you must, but above all, cheat". Bobby "The Brain" Heenan). After watching the wrestling classics Sunday morning, or at least as many as I could, I realized that even then, even as I was growing up, the faces were busy cutting corners, except they were the ones getting caught all the time! They'd ball up the fist and telegraph the punch, only to have the heel point it out to the ref who would get on the face while the heel yukked it up. Yep, even then, even my heroes like Haystacks Calhoun did it. Hmmm. Guess I'll have to have my rose-colored glasses checked for accuracy.

Sid is the champ? Man, talk about a bankruptcy of ideas. Oh well, at least it beats Big Poochie. Then again, perhaps that's their idea of a swerve. And realistically, they are short a few headliners. However I can't suppress that queasy feeling in the pit of my stomach generally reserved for Hogan appearances.

One final shot, Rena Mero is back in the "news". Granted, it's not like it's earth-shattering, or anything, but it seems that our dear Ms. Mero, who's evaluation of her talent is vastly higher than anybody else's is now writing a book. Well, rather than try to paraphrase, let me reprint this from the "NY Post" 1-26-00, Business section.

RENA Mero, the blond bombshell formerly known as pro wrestler Sable, is hoping to become the queen of all media. She's shopping for a publisher for her book, entitled, "Busting Out: My Life as Sable and Beyond."

"It went out to everyone last week," said her literary agent Craig Nelson, who expects to hold an auction in the next week or so to capitalize on the wrestling mania that has swept the nation.

Mero ended up in some nasty fights with her former employers at the World Wrestling Federation when she tried to get out of her contract. WWF was reportedly pushing to have her bare her breasts on national TV and introduce a lesbian theme into her act. Mero balked and filed a $100 million lawsuit, since settled out of court.

The one-time single mother appeared in the buff for Playboy in three separate issues last year, but Playboy had to reprint a special issue dedicated to her because of a trademark fight over the Sable name. The WWF contends it owns the name.

But her departure from wrestling has not seemed to slow down her appeal. She is said to have a pilot in development to do a TV show with bizzaro NBA star Dennis Rodman and she's also telling people she plans to play a dual role in a move titled "Doppleganger 224."

Pardon me, did that article say her "appeal"? Can anybody tell me what appeal she has/had aside from her considerable breast size? No? Me either. And if she wants to be taken seriously as an actor, why team up with Dennis Rodman? Makes absolutely no sense to me.

Sorry, Rena. The spotlight has moved on. Welcome to the real world.

Jerry Root
[slash] wrestling

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