Well, I decided to stick around for a while after an OVERWHELMINGLY nonexistent response to my last column, what with all this newsworthy shit flying around this week.

However, before we embark on me ripping someone else a new exit hole, I'd just like to thank Sharon Austin and Rebecca Cerese for...well, agreeing with me. Oh, and recommending my column-can't forget that one! Look them up on the site-you won't be disappointed, I promise ya.

So, onto this "newsworthy week" thing I was talking about earlier. Yessir, it's been quite a big seven days in the world o' rasslin', what with my FAVOURITE MAN OF ALL TIME Triple H returning Monday night, and WCW FINALLY being put back in Uncle Eric's pocket after all this speculation. But I don't really wanna talk about all that stuff this week. No, instead I'm gonna talk about something that a lot of people seem to care less and less about each week-ECW. Y'see, just over a week ago Paul E. and the boys put on Guilty As Charged, their annual January pay-er-view. Why do I point this reekingly obvious happening out? Because ECW has become so small-scale and unnoticeable that many of you may not have been aware of it, that's why. Let's go back and look at that night, shall we?

In the few weeks leading up to GAC 2001, it became apparent that the show just wasn't receiving enough attention for a PPV. That is, until Paul E. started harping on about a "Holy Shit Surprise" that would turn ECW on it's head and all that crap. And so the whispers began...Was it a new star? A free agent (possibly Scott Hall or Curt Hennig)? Was it a new TV deal? Heyman put a lid on some of the rumours by declaring it was a "talent surprise", which got people all the more het up. So, with not much else to look forward to, the I-Net intelligentsia awaited Paul E's second coming of ECDUb...

The night started off relatively normally, with the solid undercard stuff being put forth by those reliable grafters who ALWAYS do their thing for Philly's Finest Madhouse-and the return of Chris Chetti to boot. Then things went a bit odd when Rhino came out and gored the shit out of ALL the participants in the Simon/Swinger and Balls/Chilly match, including a SICK second rope piledriver on jasmine St. Clair. After that he declares he's not done for tonight-which sends shivers of fear down the workrate fan's backs...

Fast forward to the main event, where the Sandman won the ECW Title in a Three Way Dance against Justin Credible and Steve Corino in a boring TLCC Match. Sure enough, no sooner had Sandy cracked open a beer than out came Rhino, tossing his TV Title and verbally burying it, then challenging the Drunken Master for his newly-won crown. And in two minutes it was over, and Rhino was the World Champion.

But that, of course, was not it.

As the Rookie Monster stood celebrating, who should happen to walk out but Rob Van Dam, oh he of Ego Huge. And there's another challenge laid down-but thankfully, Paul E settles down and opts for an impromptu Jerry Lynn/RVD match-which ends with Lynn, predictably, jobbing.

But again, that's not it.

Backstage we go, where the two men who beat the Hell out of each other earlier, Credible and Corino, have suddenly decided to make up-and now they're dubbed the Impact Players 2K.

Many reporters praised this night as one of change for ECW, a new beginning, a chance to give the right people the ball and let them run with it. You know what I say?

Big F'n Deal.

Let's look at this scenario, shall we, and see just what can be gained from it....

1. Rhino now holds both belts and is announced as the "ECW Unified Champion", basically rendering the TV Title useless and giving those singles wrestlers below the main event NOTHING to aspire to.

2. Rhino has barely left the starting blocks in ECW and is still essentially a rookie. He is NOT ready to carry the Philly flag, and, simply put, is not a main event guy yet.

3. Rhino is a total load. Sorry, but he is. He cannot carry a decent match at the top of the card. It's just not FRICKIN' possible for the man to do it.

4. RVD is now established as the top contender for the World Title-despite the fact that his only appearance for ECW in the last three months was at Guilty As Charged and he's about as reliable as Sid during softball season. He's been put over the other possible main event guy-Jerry Lynn, AGAIN-meaning if RVD bolts, then they're screwed.

5. The Impact Players 2K are just not needed. The tag division in ECW is already saturated to the extreme (pardon the pun) and both guys are needed at the top of the card. And what are they-face? Heel? Fence-hoppers?

6. The Sandman is being gravely mistreated. as one of Paul E's longtime guys he should be the one carrying the torch through troubled times, seeing as outside RVD he's the only credible champ around. He should not be getting squished by Rhino in under three minutes.

So there you have it. Just a few reasons why Guilty As Charged was a terrible move for Paul E. to make-not to mention the fact that the show hardly lived up to the "Holy Shit Surprise" label that was slapped on it. The whole thing reminded me of last year's Great American Bash, where Bisch and Russo crowed for weeks about their big surprise-which we won't go into here because I could without a brain aneurism today, thankyou very much. ECW's on a downward spiral-and Guilty As Charged was NOT the way to break it.

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