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Tanvir Raquib

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I admit to being a fairly obsessive professional wrestling fan. It's not just a hobby, it's a way of life, as well.

But I also admit to being a slow thinker. Except when it comes to who I want to see on my television.

Since being a fairly smart wrestling fan for a couple of years, my viewing habits have changed tenfold. My willingness to watch certain guys in the ring have changed. I'm less willing to watch a 20 minute mic session than I was a year ago.

Vince Russo would be a fine example to use, right?

I don't watch a whole lot of him on the mic, but when I do, I find him to be very humorous.

The man is supposedly a New York tough street guy who JUST HAPPENS to be a writer for a wrestling promotion. Funny, I don't run into too many street thugs who moonlight as screenwriters here in New York, but maybe I'm not walking into the right neighborhood. What part of capitalist white-bred Long Island is Russo from again?

Anyhow, the humor comes in HOW he acts on the mic.

It's not the same type of humor you might find by watching Chris Rock.

It's the type of humor that you see when-you-laugh-at-the-old-lady-who-stumbles-down-a-flight-of-stairs kind.

Sure, it's mean spirited. But you know it's funny - especially if the person is a bitch.

When Russo talks into that mic and that camera focuses on him, I see great fodder for some humor.

One thing I notice about Russo is his tendency to shift his body left and right. As I alluded to in a prior column, he just can't stand still during an interview. Notice how the camera races to keep Russo in the center of the frame.

At least McMahon can stand still when he does an interview. His feet are firmly on the mat as he laces into the fans, the faces and every Christian fundamentalist week in and week out.

Vince McMahon is the epitome of pure confidence - it shows in his posture, really.

Vince Russo looks like me speaking in front of class in the first grade - without the stuttering, but with the shaking.

Russo also has another humorous quality - his unwillingness to keep his face squarely on the camera. I notice his tendency to move his nostrils ever so slightly up when he does an interview. It reminds me alot of myself for some reason. It also reminds me of that Oasis guy in the "Wonderwall" video - that guy's nostrils are quite noticeable!

Facial expressions are absolutely key in playing the kind of kickass heel that Russo wants to portray. But if Russo's nostrils are flying all over the camera and thus, onto my screen - why the fuck should I even give a shit about him?

Notice Vince McMahon's facial expressions. Sure, they are very overdramatized, but that is what is called for in this sports entertainment genre. But he doesn't really have much that make me want to make fun of him about. Vince's nostrils do flare, but they are meant to during an angry tirade. Maybe it's his puffy hair. He blackens his hair for sure. Notice how his hair was distinctly white on that Smackdown he returned on. I just can't find a damn thing about him facially to make fun of.

Let's take a gander at what Mr.Russo wears to the ring during one of those beloved mic sessions.

Sneakers. Baseball jerseys and T-shirts. Jeans.

Now, I know that Russo wants to portray "New York Tough", but the clothing he's wearing is KILLING him. What Russo is doing is giving an even worse rip-off of the Mamalukes' gimmick. But at least the Mamalukes were somewhat plausible in my estimation. People actually do dress like them over here - well, I seen a couple.

But what does Russo's dress do that makes him "New York Tough"?

The clothing he wears just serves to remind people about where he's from. It's a non-verbal reminder to the fans.

And not a good one at that.

Russo doesn't get that alot of people in America are Yankee fans. Go to any American city and you're bound to spot someone wearing a Yankee cap. It's that mainstream.

Russo's dress has to seperate himself from the fans. He has to be distinct in what he wears to the ring. It doesn't have to be over the top, just different...

Let's take a gander at Vinnie Mac's wardrobe.

Pants. Buttoned shirt but no tie. Jacket.

Stuff that rich guys wear.

You know why this is a good non-verbal reminder to the fans? Because McMahon's dress represents everything the common man dislikes - money, power, and greed. It helps to reinforce McMahon's image as an evil capitalist. Imagine if Vince walked down to the ring wearing a T-shirt and jeans. Weird, huh? The subtle things like what McMahon wears are often the very important ones.

The one thing that really gets me is Russo's speech.

The tone of his voice doesn't make me hate him. It sounds very unassuming. When Russo raises his voice, he still sounds very unintimidating. In my opinion, Russo's voice all but ruins him. He doesn't put enough power to it. Granted, he's only been on the mic for a couple of months and for a period as a WWF commentator. I'd really suggest taking him off the mic. An awkward sounding voice isn't going to sell "New York Tough" to me.

I think we all know about Vince McMahon's mic skills. He completely blows Russo away on the mic. His speech is absolutely perfect to sell his character. I remember growing up and watching Vince McMahon, the face commentator. In my opinion, he did that job very well.

McMahon can play both sides very well. His heel side is a bit over the top, but that's got to be a fair estimation of his real life demeanor.

Hopefully, Russo starts taking some notes on how to improve himself from a physical aspect. Lots and lots of notes. Course that won't help as much as booking a whole promotion correctly, but it's a start.

I'm hoping someone emails me. Tell me I make sense and that you want more essays from me. I promise to write back.

Tanvir Raquib
[slash] wrestling

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