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BLAH

WCW THOUGHTS

At least Sid Vicious didn't powerbomb me Monday night. I was in the safety of my living room. Those in the WCW locker room weren't so fortunate.

The Sid push is on and it's catching speed very quickly. Right off the top, we were told that Sid was challenging Hulk Hogan for the WCW heavyweight championship of the world! And, get this, Sid is 55-0. Now we have a streak angle again, Goldberg II. I guess those DQ losses that Sid suffered don't count. But then again David Flair was undefeated even though Meng squashed him. And it happened on TV. WCW must figure that none of us can remember anything. Well, this is WCW, let's don't forget that.

I have read some negative recaps of this Nitro, which played to another hot crowd in Colorado Springs. All I can is it worked for me. Three hours of laughter. But I do have to say this: WCW is very predictable. I called all the run-ins beforehand. It was that obvious.

So now we have Hogan-Sid in the main event. Somebody has to lose. Right? Well, stay tuned. Again, this is WCW. They're playing up Sid's "streak" so that won't give. And Hogan's on the retro Hulkamania push. So he can't lose either. They'll figure out something, don't worry.

In our first match, we have Juventud Guerrera versus Lash LeRoux. There's no angle between these two. Can you see it coming? Yep. A chokeslam for Juvi. A powerbomb for LeRoux. Another powerbomb for LeRoux. Sid grabs the stick. "I am the one who is happening," Sid said. "In the year 2000, the name Sid Vicious will be there the loudest!" And he's going to break Goldberg's record. "The name Goldberg will be obsolete," Sid said.

But, you know, Sid has a soft side, sort of. "I don't enjoy coming out here and beating up people like this," Sid said. "But it's what I have to do." And he promises to do it all night long. Tony Schiavone proclaims Sid the Millenium Man. No, Tony, it's that guy WCW let get away.

Next up is Steve Regal versus Scotty Riggs, who is doing a cheap knock off of Paul Orndorff's Mr. Wonderful character. Riggs is looking at himself in that little mirror. Thinks he's the stuff. Well, Buff sure isn't. "He will catch a lot of heat from the other wrestlers," Schiavone said. "Wrestlers do not like to be shown up." Tony actually said something that is true. Wow.

The point of this match? Another Sid run-in. Regal gets chokeslammed. Sid drags Riggs by the wrist and talks to the cameras. "Hogan, this is going to happen all night long!" Sid said. The crowd starts a Goldberg chant. But Sid is willing to stop running in. "Mr. Hogan, just give me what is mine," Sid said, asking for the belt. Then he powerbombs Riggs.

The Cat is up next, taking on Mike Enos. Schiavone said he hoped there would be no more interference by Sid. "But you never know," he said. Miller does his usual thing on the mic and then had a prediction, that Sid's run-in would happen in less than four minutes. No, I said that. Miller said he would take out Enos in that amount of time. Sid won't ruin this match because Miller is a FOB. This match was kind of sloppy. Sonny Onoo got up on the ring apron as per usual. Enos nabs him, though, and military presses him over his head. And then Enos waits for what seemed like forever for Miller kick him in the back and pin him.

After a commercial break, Sid is destroying LaParka and Silver King in some pantry-like room. Sid throws a beer keg at Silver King and powerbombs LaParka onto a huge bag of popcorn. "What is this, the commissary," Bobby Heenan said. Sid again offers a way out. "Give me what is mine and it will be over," he said. Sid realizes that David Flair got handed the U.S. title, so why shouldn't he get the world title without a fight? "Our cameras will follow this wherever it goes," Schiavone promised.

Lenny took on Rey Jr. next. And this is a cruiserweight title defense! Unreal. There's no 30-day rule on defending this belt. Lodi has his signs. One said We Dive With Greg Louganis. And I thought they were brothers, not gay. There were actually some nice moves in this match. Lenny hit what looked like a face first powerbomb. Then he hit a plancha from the top turnbuckle that took out both Lodi and Rey on the floor.

But.....he's back. Chokeslam for Rey. Double chokeslam for Lenny and Lodi. Powerbomb for Rey, though Sid kind of gently put him down. But Sting and Hogan have had enough and they chase off Sid. Gene Mean joins them. Sid yells to Hogan that, "you don't want none of this!" Sid again asks for the belt. Hogan replies, "I came to train, say my prayers and kick your ass!" It wasn't muted, either. He forgot about the vitamins, though.

Then Hogan turned to Sting and said he would get his shot at the belt next Monday in Las Vegas. "We're friends now but I get to Vegas I'm going to train, say my prayers and kick your ass," Hogan said. Again, no muting. Does Sting accept? "I say a big, fat definite yes," Sting said.

Let's see.....Hogan makes a heel turn in Las Vegas. Scott Hall and Kevin Nash come back as the Outsiders and then nWo rises from the ashes. Yes, Nash is "retired" but you know how that works.

Then it was Dead Pool time. The ICP takes on Public Enemy, who bring out two tables. Johnny Grunge of PE let's us know it's double-table night. Someone's going to take a large bump, count on it. Vampiro takes issue with a cameraman after a Dead Pool conference outside the ring. "That's not for you to see," Vampiro said. "Unless Bobby Heenan sends you over here, you don't come." Is Heenan a member of the Dead Pool now? Come on WCW, make Heenan a heel announcer again. He isn't Jesse Ventura but he's not bad. This was a big time spotfest. Shaggy 2 Dope got put through the tables. It was quite a bump. The tables did not break completely. Late in the match, referee Johnny Boone told Violent J he wasn't the legal man. But Boone got bumped, so it didn't matter. That allowed Vampiro to interfere and nail the spicoli driver on Rocco Rock and roll Violent J on top for the pin as Boone recovered. Where was Sid? Vampiro is getting a push, so Sid left him alone. But another thought comes to mind. They gave Sid the belt. Oh, no! He said that's what it would take to stop the carnage.

Gene Mean had the new tag team champs, Harlem Heat, out for some mic time. They are eight time champs, yeah. Stevie Ray says he dumped those four "fruit booties" in the nWo black and white who couldn't get the job done.

There's another Berlyn promo. We just can't tell that this guy is Alex Wright, can we?

Then it was mic time for the nWo remains. Horace says, "Shut up you pukes!" Then he makes a racial dig, ouch. "Vincent, there's nothing worse than a brother gone bad," Horace said, referring to Stevie Ray. Norton assails Stevie Ray, too. Then Brian Adams says he and Vincent will challenge Harlem Heat. Norton replies with an elbow and it's a three-on-one beating. Where did that come from?

Gene Mean is out yet again. This time he's got Billy Kidman and they start talking about partying and chasing chicks. Nothing wrong with that. Then, Gene asks Kidman who his favorite Nitro girl is. Why, it's Kimberly. Did DDP, the real life husband, come out? What do you think? How about Sid? No, he realizes he can't powerbomb Kidman. And he might already have the belt.

Kidman did get to announce the formation of the Filthy Animals, the new gang that includes himself, Eddie Guerrero, Rey Jr. and Konnan. He said that, no disrespect to DDP, but Kimberly is drop dead gorgeous. DDP hit the ring and thundered, "What the hell are you talking about!?" "Come on Page. I've got nothing but respect for you and your wife," Kidman said. DDP responded with a rocker dropper type of move. "Get me a ref!" DDP yelled.

As funny as this sounds, it was a DDP squash during and after the match except for the three seconds it took Kidman to score the pinfall. Page nailed a peoples' elbow. Then he set up Kidman for the powerbomb. Big mistake. You can't do that, DDP. Kidman reverses it into a face jam. No, he doesn't!!!! DDP powerbombs Kidman. For those of you who may think some things are impossible, take heart, anything is possible. DDP covers. One, two, no. He picks him up. Kidman rallies but DDP is no selling. DDP hits a spinebuster. One, two, no. He picks him up again.

This time DDP goes for the diamond cutter but Kidman fights out and rolls him up for the pin! DDP is immediately in the ref's face, claiming Kidman held his tights. DDP then gave the ref a diamond cutter. Then he gave Kidman one. He puts Kidman in the tree of woe. Kevin Sullivan is smiling. DDP tears off Kidman's shirt and lashes him with the ref's belt. Kimberly finally runs out and convinces DDP to stop. "He's your friend," she said. DDP won't listen to it. Like I've said before, DDP knows how to job.

Heenan and Schiavone discuss the fact that Sid has laid out nine wrestlers. Heenan wonders if that makes him 64-0. With WCW's logic, why not?

Disco Inferno is out next with a mic. Everybody is talking tonight. With regard to him being in the Filthy Animals, "Don't call me, I'll call you." Chris Benoit interrupts and we have another match. This was a good tussle, with lots of offense from both men. Benoit went over cleanly, too.

Goldberg came out to a huge pop. He's got Barry Windham tonight. If you went to the bathroom, you missed it. He took out both Kendall Windham and Bobby Duncum, Kendall via the spear. Barry finally entered. Spear, jackhammer, end of story.

Up next was Harlem Heat against all three remaining nWo members in tag team handicap match. By doing this, they told us an Adams run-in would be a part of the match. Horace was setting up to powerbomb Stevie Ray when Adams ran in and cleaned house. Referee Nick Patrick let it go because it became a three-on-three. Adams departed.....all the way outside the ring and into a limo with a KISS license plate.

Rick Steiner defended his TV title against Brian Knobbs. The crowd sort of sang along with Steiner's mic work. Once the match began, however, they chanted Goldberg's name. Jimmy Hart's botched interference led to Steiner's win.

Bam Bam Bigelow fought Perry Saturn to keep the Triad -Revolution angle going. Saturn had a 10-punch going when Bam Bam shoved him right into the ref. Well, they did have to set up the run-ins. Kanyon pushed Saturn off the top rope into a Bam Bam bearhug. Shane Douglas pushed Kanyon onto both of them. The ref recovered in time to count Saturn pinning Bam Bam as Kanyon hot shotted Douglas to the concrete. Kanyon and Bam Bam pound on Saturn. Dean Malenko and Benoit charge down the ramp, pick up Douglas along the way and saved the day. It looked like Douglas was going to stay outside, keeping the angle moving where he turns heel at some point.

Finally, it's main event time. Sid went on the attack as soon as Hogan stepped through the ropes, strapping the champ with his own belt. It was pretty much a brawl. Sid used Hogan's leg drop. See, Hugh Morrus, it's OK to use other people's moves. Hogan did a lot of no selling. There were some nice bumps. At one point, Sid grabbed Hogan's head and slammed it on the announce table. Several times Sid demanded the bell be rung. But Hogan kept hulking up.

Heenan remarked that "these guys are tired." After five minutes? Geez. Ricky Steamboat and Rick Flair once worked a three-fall 54-minute match.

So how do they solve this dilemma about who goes over? Simple. Steiner runs in. But doesn't that mean a DQ for Sid. No! The ref lets it go. Sting comes out to help Hogan. Sting and Sid spill outside the ring. Hogan gets the upper hand on Steiner. Foot to the face. Leg drop. He covers him. The ref counts 1, 2, 3 and calls for the bell. I tried to explain this to my dad but he kept saying that Hogan was wrestling Sid. Yes, dad but the ref counted the pinfall on Steiner. It happened. There are times when a run-in doesn't seem like a good idea. This crowd sure didn't like it, showering the ring with drinks. But the storyline required it.

I guess Steiner's entrance made this a triple threat match since the title was on the line. Dad wanted to know if Steiner had pinned Hogan, would he have got the belt? No, dad! Hogan won't ever job to Steiner. Anyhow they did it. Hulkamania rules and I guess Sid's "streak" is alive.

Meanwhile, Sid is looking for more people to powerbomb. Better hope he doesn't come to your neighborhood!

Until next time, hey yo!

Mr. Mean
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Guest column text copyright (C) 1999 by the individual author and used with permission