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Mike S.

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DISSECTING...STUFF!

Interesting thing happened a few days ago.

I was surfing the net and on a whim I went to CRZ's page to read a Raw recap of a show that I went to back in '98. When the page was loaded up however,I saw something neat. A column of mine called Dissecting Vince Russo, which I had written in the first part of October. So I read through it...and damned if I wasn't right about what's happened to WCW. They are still in the shitter, and Russo has only made things worse. But I digress...I'll hit on WCW (and ECW and WWF for that matccer) a bit later.

Anyway, so I'm reading over this column and I get an idea. What if I were to start writing again? Hell, I've actually improved as a writer since then (at least I hope I have), and besides that, it'd be pretty cool to have people read and respond to my thoughts on different wrestling-related topics. And so here I am at thee-thirty in the morning since I can't sleep, writing my first column in months.

Ok, enough of that. For those of you who haven't read my stuff before, this is how I write my columns. I'll pick either a wrestler or some issue/topic relating to wrestling, and 'dissect' it. I'll talk about the topic's past, its standing nowadays, what's going on with it, what I see happening in the future, what needs to change, etc. Also, I will probably recommend various wrestling and non-wrestling-related sites for y'all to go to, and I expect you to click on everything that I recommend or I will personally kick each and every one of your asses.

Now that I've covered all those bases, let's talk about what I'm supposed to be writing about in the first place, wrestling. For this column, I'll just do a blanket overview of what's going on in both of the big two promotions, and ECW. Let's get to it.

WCW

If you were to do a search on Yahoo or Lycos for the word 'pathetic' the search would bring up three letters, WCW. This fed has sank to levels of pure suck that I didn't think were possible for a major wrestling promotion to sink to. It honestly seems that they cannot do one thing right. They remind me of a guy I went to high- school with who fucked up everything he tried, they are just that bad.

Going into detail on this point, let's look at some of WCW's big stars and what's been done with them lately:

GOLDBERG->Out of action for a few weeks. When he comes back, I would assume that he'll probably be feuding with the reincarnated NWO. Great. Let's stick Goldberg in the SAME DAMN ANGLE as he was in back in 98. And I thought Vince Russo was full of brand new ideas...

BRET HART->Is he a heel or a face? Who knows with this guy, he changes his good/evil alignments like I change my underwear. Come on Bret, figure out whether you wanna be a heel or face and STICK WITH IT! Otherwise, it confuses 99.9 percent of the WCW fanbase and makes the Bret Hart character look like a moron. Speaking of being a moron, what in the HELL is Bret doing in the NWO? The NWO represents everything that the Bret Hart character that I grew up watching in loving back in the early/mid 90's would hate. Having him in the NWO and feuding with Terry Funk's boys is the worst misuse of a great wrestler that I have ever seen. Hey Bret, are you wishing nowadays that you hadn't basically told the WWF to fuck off? You'd be better off there right now.

STING->Out of everyone in WCW, Sting is the one who I feel the worst for. Sting is the kind of wrestler a promoter DREAMS of, a loyal company man who will stick by his federation until the day he dies, and who can also work a decent match and isn't too bad on the mic, as well as having a shitload of charisma. So what did the Good Ship WCW do with Sting for the past few years? Misuse him in every way possible. His heel turn mid '99 was a flop, and now it appears as though he's going to go back to being spooky Crow-sting just like when he fought the NWO in late '97. Whoopdie-shit. His heat is leaving him faster than ice water from a glass sitting right in the middle of hell, and WCW is content to piss it all away. Good going WCW, treat the one guy who has been with you for the past 10 years, through the good times and the bad times, like shit.

EDDIE GUERERRO->Leave it to WCW to fuck up another great talent in this business. Besides Benoit, Liger, and a few others from Japan, there may not be a better pure wrestler on this planet than Eddie. So what does WCW do with him? Stick him with a stable who does NOTHING from week to week, and not even bother to give him ample time to get himself over. Eddie should be having **** matches with Benoit, Malenko, Rey Jr, and Sting on a daily basis, not in a stable which is nothing more than a bad racial stereotype. Fuck you, Vince Russo.

I could go on and on here. Benoit, Flair, Kidman, the freaking Luchadores, just about everyone in the mid-card, but I'd like to get this done before Saturday. However, with Bret Hart and Jarrett out with concussions and the sad state of WCW angle and talent-wise, I just can't see them pulling out of the slump they're in for quite awhile. If they ever want to be a legit threat to the WWF, they're going to have to do what the WWF had to do in 96 and 97. Totally reorganize their booking committee, roster, and shift the focus from angles to what the WCW/NWA was always about back in the good ol' days, good wrestling matches. I've said it once and I'll say it again, the WCW will NEVER be able to pull off angles like the WWF. So they may as well not even try.

WWF

As anyone who read my stuff on here from September/October of 1999 knows, I'm a WWF mark. I'll watch Nitro over Raw any day of the week (because WCW sucks just that bad and I hate anything related to Ted Turner anyway), and I'm not shy about admitting it. So if this part of my column sounds a bit pro-WWF, forgive me. I'll try to write this with as much objectiveness as I can.

That being said, the WWF is by far the supreme wrestling fed in North America right now. They have the talent, the angles, the slickly-written shows, the characters, and the brains that every other fed is lacking right now. Just about every character in the WWF is being used to the best that it can be right now, and the WWF has really started to bring back good wrestling matches to go along with the good storylines. Hell, they got RIKISHI FATU over! And Fatu actually DOES NOT SUCK in the ring. That's pretty fucking great, folks. However, I see a big problem ahead for the WWF. And its onethat, if not handled correctly, could be a big thorn in its side. That problem is, too many big-name talent.

Right now, the WWF has the Rock, HHH, Kane, the rest of D-X, and Cactus Jack as its first-class stars. Now within a few months they will be getting Tazz, the Undertaker (who, as the biggest UT mark on the web, I can't WAIT to see again), Austin, the Stooges, Vince and Shane McMahon, and maybe a few others. Now on the surface, an influx of big-name talent may be great for the WWF. But I disagree. It has been proven by the WCW (see 96 and 97) that too many big-time names lead to trouble. Egos clash and the product becomes stale. And with so many main eventers, it's going to be made confusing for the WWF fans to follow along with what's going on. It has been proven that for a pro wrestling company to be a success here in the USA, you pick one big name, push him to the moon, and have everything else revolve around what is going on with that big name, to an extent. And right now, the WWF is doing that with the Rock, which is why they're so successful.

But what happens when UT and Tazz come in less than two weeks? Sure, Tazz might be used correctly and UT will certainly be over with the fans, but what about when Vince takes an on camera role? What if Austin comes back (and an Austin comeback is more and more likely, from what I hear)? Too many big stars, and not enough time/angles to go around. Something's going to have to give, and I hope that the WWF learns from WCW's mistakes with too many main eventers and doesn't screw up. If used right, all the new talent that is coming to the WWF could solidify their hold on North American wrestling that much more. If not....then the WWF may fall apart like WCW has.

ECW

You know, I really DON'T want to write this part of my column.

Not because it's late, or because I'm wanting to play a little Wrestlemania 2000. No, I don't want to write this because thinking of ECW's current situation is truly depressing.

Folks, this fed is in some serious trouble. When the main event for your PPV is Mike Awesome versus motherfucking Spike Dudley with all of a week's worth of buildup, that's sad. They need to push someone up to main event status and get them feuding with Awesome? But who? The only one that I see that could carry the world title for a while is Sabu. Or, give RVD the world title (since he's over like a mofo), give Sabu the T.V. title, and build the entire promotion on those two. Now granted, both aren't the best wrestlers in the world, but they are willing to take INSANE bumps, and they have INSANE levels of charisma. And in my opinion, they (unless Masato Tanaka is given a large role in the company) are the only two that can dig ECW out of the funk that it's in right now.

To be honest though, I don't know if that's enough. This fed has fallen so far since its glory days in 96 that it saddens me to turn on ECW T.V. nowadays. Most of their workers are working injured and the entire company seems to have taken the worst of what both of the big two have to offer, and blended it into their own special formula of maximum suckatude. And with Dusty Rhodes now working with ECW, things will only go downhill even quicker for the company.

In fact, within two years, I honestly think there is a large chance that ECW may be out of business. Beyond RVD and Sabu, I see no other signs of life. WCW and WWF have drained away their talent and fans to a (in my opinion) possibly unrecoverable point. A shame.

And that's it for this week. Next week, I'll be dissecting the online world of wrestling writers. Meltzer, Scherer, Scott Keith, Bob Ryder, even CRZ, I'll take 'em all on!

Feel free to write me with any thoughts on my views. You can reach me at ghidzilla@stratos.net

Mike S.
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