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The Things Living in my Brain:
12-14-99
The demons feeding on my soul took a night off last night and allowed me to
get my Monday night fix in relative peace. I would have to say that last
evening we were offered two wrestling programs of distinctly varied quality
and content. So without further adieu ladies and gentlemen lets.....BREAK IT
DOWN!
I used to really respect WCW Monday Nitro. Even though many of the story
lines were stale and it was hard to care about most of the top wrestlers in
the promotion, the entirety of the mid card roster worked there collective
asses off week in and week out. You knew that when Psychosis and Blitzkrieg,
for example, came down the ramp you were in for a hell of an entertaining
match. Now you get the dumbed down, redneck version, of Raw week in and week
out. Now whenever I turn on the Turner product I see them doing a faux push
for Chris Benoit (my favorite worker in the business) and milking every last
bit of credibility and respect from "Rowdy" Roddy Piper (my favorite
wrestler of all time, and another victim of Hogans inflated ass). I mean for
Christ's sake people I got the distinct "honor" of watching Sid "big moron"
Eudy fight Steve Williams?!?!?!?! We will speak no more of this.......
I watched Politically Incorrect on Friday Night and was treated to a very
special edition of this sometimes annoying program. The guests were WCW
personalities Medusa, Bobby Hennan, Roddy Piper, and someone I can't
remember. But during the show I learned two things, Booby Hennan is a very
smart and reasonable human being of high intelligence. He did the industry
proud. And I also learned that Piper has not lost his mic skills and that he
doesn't take shit from anyone. He verbally "Bitchslapped" Bill Mahr at least
twice, and when he wants to be he is a very articulate and passionate man.
He BELIEVES in what he is talking about. I miss the days when Piper was used
as the Star he should be......sigh.
I saw the debut of Dusty Rhodes on ECW TNN Friday Night and I must say
that The ECW crowed popped like mad for the aging star. If nothing else it
was nice to see Dusty treated with respect. The show was probably the best
that Heyman and company has put on TNN. Now in the damn Nashville Network
would just promote the show, or maybe move it to Tuesday Nights. ECW has the
potential now they just need to realize it.
Raw was of above average quality last night and therefore, unlike WCW,
gets the point by point breakdown.
Stephanie McM.....er....Helmsley has gone from my icon of innocence and
girlish beauty, to a vivacious and bitchy temptress that I would never bring
home to meet my mother or father. All I can say is....YUMMY! This new "Evil
Stephanie" has captured my heart like no one else, except Chyna. And now I
will raise a glass to her bright and Tight future.
Triple H rocks! Hunter is the greatest Heel working in the business today.
Yes I know that I said this before, but it's so damn true.
Enough of the raging Vince. I liked him better when he was the cold and
calculating Son of a Bitch.
How do you think that Linda feels about this change in Steph?
Mark Henry and Mae Young! That made me laugh my ass off! Mark has sunk to
a new low. I would be embarrassed to be Mark Henry these days.
Although the Rock N' Sock Connection annoys the shit straight out of me,
My respect for Mick Foley and Duane Johnson continues to grow. Instead of
cutting a meaningless promo about The Tag Team Belts and maybe doing a
meaningless match against them again, they work a highly entertaining bout
with the Dudleys. It just goes to show that these two have a strong enough
sense of self respect to help put the other guys over. Al Snow, The
Dudleys...etc...
Miss Kitty, excuse me The Cat (take that Ernest Miller), is entertaining
as hell. And besides what red blooded American male (or Canadian,
Australian, British.....) can resist a chocolate pudding match?
The Mean Street Posse SUCKS!!! Sorry I just had to say that, I'm loving
the Acolytes destroying them.
X-Pac is a walking joke now. He's out there in a wetsuit, mask, and
flippers! What the hell is up with that? I bet Eric Bischoff is laughing his
ass off. The days of the big hearted 1-2-3 Kid are over. Long live X-Joke!
Kane rules all, they are having Glenn talk a hell of allot more these
days. They just best not take the Mask off!
The Big Bossman should have the World Heavyweight Belt. Sorry folks that's
just my opinion.
They beat Test down at the end of the show, that just solidifies Stephanie
as a first class heel. Long live "Evil Steph"!
The world is a funny place and the world of prowrestling is an even funnier
place. This Year we have had a star fall to his death in the ring, A man and
his Ho's have become a sensation, Steve Austin is fall back to the Midcards
and maybe even retirement, The Rock is the biggest Face in the business,
Mick Foley is a three time World Champ, Paul White and Chris Jericho have
both come to the WWF and now have the two most important straps in the fed
around there respective waists, Chyna has crossed over successfully to the
male portion of wrestling, and Miss Kitty has broken the nudity Taboo. Yeah
it's been a hell of a year in the squared circle and the new year promises
to be even better.
Till next time......be careful out there.
Citizen Lazlo
freelance
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