I have survived the move-in! IT'S A MIRACLE! Hey, what can I say, I'm home in Durham, NC, down at prestigious Duke University. I wasn't able to go to SummerSlam in nearby Raleigh, though; more on that show later.

First, thanks for all the positive feedback on my variation of SummerSlam, which, while dated, might have made a good show anyway. I know one thing; had I known the events of the past week, I might have changed the booking of the eight matches at hand. I'm also proud of the fact that I called Kane getting unmasked. That ruled!

Now, it may strike you as odd that I claim SummerSlam could be improved on. However, not knowing what's on Raw (this is being written at 7:15 PM EDT on Monday), I can say that there were five things that should have happened that didn't. And now, the Top Five Things I Would Have Fixed About SummerSlam:

5. Eliminate the New Jack moment in the Hardcore Match. I've always been against gratuitous bumps, even if they are stunning visuals. I don't want these people to get hurt if the slightest thing goes wrong. I even applaud Sting for not taking the bump off the TurnerTron (though that may have been because he would've been on fire... think of that, Scott? HUH? DID YOU?). Having said that, did we really need for Shane to drop the 30 feet that he did? Imagine the scene backstage in the future:

VINCE: "Listen, , I want you to take the 40 foot bump. It's a great visual and it'll make your career!"
WORKER: "Why should I? I could get killed!"
VINCE: "My son, a non-wrestler, is willing to do stuff like that!"
WORKER: "You're willing to sacrifice your son's livelihood for the business!"

How would Vince respond?

4. Make Eddie Guerrero the Intercontinental Champion. The first time Chyna was champ, it was out of necessity. The second time, it was a half-reign. Now, it's part of a tag match. Each time, Chyna's I-C title reigns have come more and more cheaply, and she, like the Rock (think about it), has never done anything truly on her own. Eddie absolutely HAS to turn on Chyna and give her the beating she deserves. Guerrero's better as a heel anyway.

And before you female wrestling fans (both of you) write me and say I'm a chauvinist, I say, no! If any wrestler gains three title reigns through contract expiration, double pin, and tag match, I'm going to call them illegitimate too!

3. Have Tazz squash Lawler. You may argue this happened, but from what I saw, Lawler got in quite a bit of offense. Furthermore, Tazz jobbed to a shot with a water pitcher from JIM ROSS! His heat should legitimately be gone, and this when they had a beautiful opportunity for him to get over as an angry heel. It's a crying shame, and no amount of restitution tonight on Raw can fix it.

Tazz, go back to Heyman. Beg him for your job back. You don't fit in. Leaving was a mistake. You've been next to nothing ever since. Russo couldn't misuse you any more than McMahon has. In fact, he could team you with Dustin Rhodes as an anti-politics team. SMELL THE RATINGS!

2. Give the Hardyz the friggin' tag straps! I'm certain that the Hardyz will not leave North Carolina without the belts. That's not the point. The point is, it's your second biggest PPV of the year, Edge and Christian are ready to move on to better things because their tag run is getting stale, you have a team that is MONSTER over anywhere and especially in their own HOME TOWN, and you... don't switch the belts? The match demanded that the Hardyz win!

It's true; it's true. And my, my, my, how that segues into my biggest gripe...

1. Resolve the love triangle. After all the buildup of SummerSlam's hype virtually surrounding the love triangle, the card needed the blowoff right then and there. Instead, you have the show end with Stephanie out, HHH out, Angle being the knight in shining armor, Steph's motives still unknown, no one turning anywhere, and a big old "To Be Continued"! Even Vince Russo knew that your biggest shows (Mania and SummerSlam) needed resolutions of their main event storylines. Yes, he f'ed up the Starrcade main; he has since apologized.

But Russo is not the issue; Vince McMahon is. He had a golden opportunity to either turn HHH face of turn Angle face, either of which the crowd is BEGGING for. They give both men cheers upon their entrances, just before they cut heel promos. SOMEONE had to be turned on. And Stephanie, who we all are being led to believe is trying to maintain peace, is a MCMAHON! McMahons are built never to be trusted; why is now a difference?

Bottom Line: SummerSlam was NOT, I repeat, *NOT* a Thumbs Up. The overblown spotfest that is the TLC match, much like its prequel at WrestleMania, had no psychology in the whole thing. Yes, this was better, but it should have built on the other. Furthermore, The Rock, the most over man and the World Champion, is out of the main event spotlight thanks to Hunter Hearst Hogan and his marriage trouble. And this is the second time in the last twleve months HHH has pulled this stunt!

If Russo put on a show like this, with the booking that occurred, he would have been roundly criticized by everyone. And rightly so, since he doesn't blow off the main event until the next night in many instances. Here, however, the same thing has happened, and Vince McMahon will be praised for a great show. I assure you, the only difference between McMahon and Russo right now is that McMahon has better talent to manipulate.

I know, controversy. It's a bitch, ain't it? And as Tom the Actuary said, I love iconoclasm. Hey, why write about what you AGREE with?

So, to defend this show as a well-booked PPV (I will concede it was a great show from a workrate point of view, as everyone did what they did best), email me at apg@duke.edu, and we'll discuss. Until then, and until next time, from 15 feet high, this is Andy P. Goss, signing off.