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/wrestling /guests /Franck |
| Guest Columns | Michael Franck |
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MIKE'S DELAYED REACTION That's right, I'm back. I've noticed the intelligence level of some of the crap around here is lacking so here I am to raise the average IQ to the lofty standards that CRZ had hoped for in the beginning (I'll let you figure out who that's directed to and judging by some of the letters I've gotten, I think you know!). Hey let's just remember that these columns are intended to be well thought out, meaningful, and somewhat intelligent, so sorry for the shortcomings of some of my peers. Alright I know I usually take my time in writing my take on the Monday Night shows but I decided to submit my column before everyone else filled your heads with the usual bullshit that accompanies most reviews and, more importantly, to be ORIGINAL. On to the WAR IS RAW...I mean RAW IS...nevermind. We start of another great show from WWF with....The Acolytes!!! I am already reaching for my remote control. I hesitate just in time to actually here these two morons talk. As usual...I'm disappointed. But all the sudden Holly comes out to take, what is now becoming his weekly beating. I've come to the conclusion that Hardcore Holly either has an infatuation with getting his ass kicked over and over again or is just extremely stupid. Hey Holly! You aren't really that big to begin with and you continue to challenge people that are 4 times the size of you or you fight 3 guys at the same time. You WWF fans call Sting stupid for teaming with Hogan? At least Sting has a fighting chance. There's Edge and he's having family problems. I have said before that I like edge but isn't this fairly similar to the Steiner Bros. or the Harlem Heat angles of last year? New Slogan...."Watch WWF, We Used To Be Original". Edge vs. Gangrel in a Bloodbath match. All of these Blood, Death, and Dark Side angles seem to have formed a pattern. Perhaps due to the fact that Vince has sold his soul? Just a thought. Now that Goldberg has switched to that pathetic Megadeth song, Gangrel now gets my vote for best entrance music (minus that fag walk to the ring he continues to do). Pretty good match here with a nice feel good ending but I'm tired of all these matches having something to do with blood. Here's the biggest leach in wrestling today...Shane McMahan. As a side note...why does it seem perfectly acceptable for WWF to waste about 30 minutes of their show on people walking around backstage? Shane breaks his silence concerning Vince's departure. What's the big deal? He was only gone for a week! I was just beginning to enjoy not seeing his chubby little face on my TV! Basically, Shane informs everyone how great Vince McMahan has been to the WWF and the wrestling industry while taking a few shots at Bischoff and WCW (wasn't Bischoff criticized for taking on air shots at WWF? More Hypocrisy). I will give Shane some credit, I don't think the WWF can survive without Vince. The last two weeks have been very uneventful without Vince in the center of things. While WWF fans may believe that the storylines and angles are just as entertaining as they have ever been, they are blinded by hype. Come Back Vinnie Mack, WWF needs you. Look, its Taker and Show. I'm still confused, how did these two come to together? OH that's right, Taker has already tried just about every angle possible with the whole dark side thing and Show is just looking for any angle possible for a no-talent, fatass. Good combination. And while we are on that kick, Kane/X-Pac makes sense. X-Pac can relate to Kane but Kane/Road Dogg doesn't cut it. For me to buy into a tag team, I have to see some kind of connection between the two and I just don't see anything between these two. The contrasting styles worked with X and Kane, don't push it with Road Dogg. Of course it may be because I don't like the DOdoubleG. Nothing against him and his wrestling/mic skills but he just annoys me. I like this match despite Taker, Show, and Road Dogg (that Kane is something special...probably his charming personality). It had good back and forth action and at least kept a little consistency with the Kane/Show and Kane/Taker angles. That is until my favorite tag team(acolytes) and the smartest man in wrestling (Holly) show up. This bothers me...I change the channel. Another classic interview from The Rock (yes I'm still upset with the way he's being used) To hell with Jarrett and D'Lo, I'm not interested. Stone Cold and Taker in the Main Event...haven't seen that before. You have to love the refreshing storylines of the WWF. Big Bossman and Viscera...I'm tired of Hardcore (and so is Fit Finley). Test and Rodney...don't get me started. To Hell with it, off to the main event! This was supposed to be another classic(haha) duel between Taker and Bone Cold. HHH has a problem with that and basically it just turns into a free-for-all clusterfuck! I don't understand why the WWF went this route but the match ended with Austin and HHH clearing the ring with their respective moves, one stunner, one pedigree. The two appear to have a stand off as we go off air. That upcoming PPV is looking more and more appealing. I hope I don't have any laundry to do that day. Onto NITRO... Hudson is back but you know his days are numbered. We start off with the Triad/Harlem Heat match. Oh my God, did this match actually end with a pinfall. Good action, crowd was into it the entire time, Page almost ruined the whole thing but Benoit saved the day. Booker T gets the pin on Kanyon (no talent at all). Benoit gets a match with DDP. The crowd gets some descent entertainment for once. I still don't like Stevie Ray. Sting is looking for Goldberg to be his partner against Woof! Woof! and Sid Justice, I mean Viscious. I like Sting and I think he is the franchise but his mic skills are lacking. How about going back to the silent sting of a couple of years ago? Next is a humor match. Lenny and Lodi just amuse me. Say what you want about The Cat but he gets a response. Even from all of you internet readers. I don't know who won this match and don't really care. Laughter is the best medicine. Damn it! Here comes Hogan. He challenges Nash tonight for the belt but we all know that Hogan's ancient body is broke. Nice try Terry but we aren't buying it. Sting's looking for an answer from Goldberg but gets jumped from Steiner and Sid. Nothing was actually said so I guess the main event will be Sting/Goldberg vs. Steiner/Sid. Is Goldberg bleeding again? This is becoming a weekly thing (there is room for you in the WWF if you would like but don't tell Hogan, he'll get pissed off again). Disco is Back!!! Yeah! I need to take a leak. Next, its time for a meaningless match between two guys who are fighting cancer and some more of those damn hardcore guys. This match means nothing to me seeing as it makes no sense and I hate all hardcore guys. Time to play with the dog! What the hell is Steiner doing to Hudson? Although this appears to make no sense whatsoever, it is the only way Bitchoff (on purpose) can bring Tony back next week while at the same time give himself a reason to finish the night at the announcer's booth. Gooooo Eric! Saturn's match with Duncum turns into a match with Curt Hennig. Pretty good action in this impromptu (???) match until the standard WCW run in. Out comes the Windham Bros with Malenko and Douglas soon to follow. Wait, weren't those two just in a match earlier? Nice Booking (would that be Nash or Bischoff this time?). This angle isn't bad but it gets in the way of the whole Horseman/Cancer angle. I'm confused! And now its time for Benoit/Page. Remember the classic face/face matches between these two a year or so ago? This one ranks right up there with those. A great match between two great talents. Page and The Crippler get intense and the crowd is really into it. What is this? Another match ending in pinfall and its Benoit!! That Bischoff always keeps us guessing doesn't he? I like the pleasant suprise. Macho is out babbling about how he is going to beat down just about everyone in the WCW (Hogan, Nash, Rodman, the lady in row three). The only thing that was entertaining in this whole segment was Bischoff's antics towards Rodman's and Macho's language. With everything getting muted out, Eric was begging for the audio to be cut off. There will surely be finds handed out for this one along with Eric getting a spanking from Ted. Onto the celebrity appearance of ICP. Vampiro comes out with ICP and Raven. I like the way this is going. ICP seems to fit in perfect with Vampiro. Now if they didn't take 10 minutes for their entrance to finish everything would've been fine.(wouldn't have anything to do with the Rodman/Macho segment would it?) Vampiro has a real good match with Eddie Guerrero. It has a little bit of everything, ICP and Raven interference, some great wrestling moves, and Bischoff demanding they get away from him! It ends with another pinfall!!! Victory to Vampiro. That is three fairly clean victories in one night (okay this one was a little suspect) and all of them went the opposite of what I expected. WCW Wrestling! DON'T MISS A MINUTE! Its time for the big Main Event! Hogan joins his brother Eric at the announcing table. I wonder if he will become involved in the match? This match is kind of annoying. It begins to get on my nerves with that damn "Crush Em" entrance music of Goldberg's. Go back to the other stuff Billy. Next, you can tell that Goldberg isn't going to be heavily involved in the match by looking at the stiches in the back of his head. I was right, Goldberg sees limited action, Sting spends most of the time on his back and it ends with Hogan smacking Steiner with a chair followed by Nash smacking Hogan with a Powerbomb onto the announcer's table. Shitty ending to a shitty match. NITRO did okay this week. Some real good matches along with a few stupid ones (as usual). They didn't stray from storylines too much, but did manage to confuse just about everybody in some instances (where are they going with Malenko and Douglas...save that match for a house show) RAW was ......Oh to hell with RAW! If noone else is going to see these two companies on an even playing field as they continue to show their bias towards WWF then I'll do the same with WCW. With Smackdown and ECW shows right around the corner, I've decided to write a column about the State of Wrestling. If you think you can provide a good input or can change my mind about my current views let me know. I've decided to get a little input from a good friend of mine (perhaps a mystery partner!!), who just happens to be a big fan of WWF, so I'm attempting to hide my current opinions between the two companies (no I will never consider the ECW a serious contender) Michael Franck The Franchise [slash] wrestling Mail the Author |
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