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INSIDE THE WRESTLERS STUDIO

Hello again everyone. This is Dmikester, and I'm here with my first real column of "Inside The Wrestler's Studio." To start off, I have to make a big apology. Two completely unrelated incidents forced me to miss even taping Thunder and ECW on TNN this week. The first was simply that I didn't realize that Thunder was on Wednesday's starting this week until Wednesday. Let me just say that I didn't exactly plan to be taping anything on Wednesday. I heard there was a great promo on Thunder with Bret Hart, so I'm sad I missed it. ECW is similar, but it was just me being careless. I went to my school's basketball games this Friday and I completely forgot I'd be back after 8:00. So there you go. I promise to be better in later weeks.

So, welcome back for those of you reading this after the introductory column and welcome to newcomers! For those of you who are new, I encourage you to read the intro, which I'm sure will be in the Graveyard on this site somewhere. To recap quickly, my idea for this column is to pull out all the promos that are cut on every show and judge them based on the acting done in the promo. My main goal is to make you think about these promos in a much different way and with a sort of heightened awareness. Once you see these bits in a sort of enlightened sense, you'll probably begin to appreciate what these wrestlers do a little bit more. Of course, in Steve Blackman and Sid's case, you'll probably hate them more, but that's ok.

All right. I'll be doing RAW, Nitro and Smackdown this week. Let me just say that these three shows overall, in my opinion, were excellent. Nitro was definitely the weakest of the three promo-wise, but wrestling-wise RAW and Smackdown didn't stand a chance outside of a couple of matches. Besides, any show that'll bring back Tito Santana, George "The Animal" Steele, and Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka to the ring is all right in my book. OK, my little pebbles, it's time to rock!

(By the way, this week, I'm going to assume you saw the promos in question. If you didn't, check out CRZ's report on WrestleLine or here for a perfect recap of the promo that'll get you on track. I'll provide my own summaries next week.)

RAW

The 20-Minute Rock, Mick and HHH Opening Promo

Well, this promo was definitely one of the most overdone things I've seen in a while. I have to admit, the opening was very odd with all the wrestlers, and the Rock did a fine job of standing in the ring and looking like The People's Champion, but his deliverance of lines left a huge amount to be desired. The Rock seemed like he'd been out late the night before and could barely talk, much less deliver lines well. As a result, this became one of the most held-back and dull performances of The Rock's I can remember. Everything outside of speaking was great, especially the hand to Stephanie, but his speech was horrible.

HHH did an adequate job, but unlike Rock, he seemed almost too much into it. HHH definitely has a tendency to overdo his promos, and this was no exception. If you actually accepted his sudden turn from screaming lunatic to kind-hearted Mick Foley reinstater in a second flat as realistic and a fine piece of acting, I think you need to rethink what acting is. However, I do think the main problem for HHH in this promo was Stephanie.

Steph has, to my dismay, gotten progressively worse as a heel. She started out pretty damn good and has gotten to becoming absurd. She was OK as a heel in this, and she did do a good job at reacting to the crowd's slut chant, but in general she's completely unbelivable. She just doesn't seem comfortable being a heel, and many times, she looks like she completely relies on HHH to do everything for her. We can only hope she'll do better next time.

The best thing in this promo by far was Mick Foley. He was in top form as always here, and he really did make me laugh out loud for the first time in a while. The dozens and dozens of fans thing was great. A note here: notice that Foley paused for the fans to chant "and dozens" and made it a awkward and overly long pause like The Rock to throw everyone in the crowd off and so that the viewers on TV could hear him say it alone. Absolutely brilliant. Once Mick came in, everything seemed to click pretty damn well, and it didn't seem too drawn out. In the end, it made for a nice setup for the show if not an incredibly stretched-out one.

DX Backstage #1

Not much to say here except typical DX acting: Everyone, except suprisingly Billy Gunn, was very over-the-top and unbelievable. For some reason, Billy Gunn was in rare form in this promo, actually drawing my attention to him only because he delivered his lines unbelievably. Watch him if you have the show on tape. It's strange but true. Usually the goofiest actor of the bunch is the most-down to earth tonight. Huh.

Mankind with Fake Mankind #1

This promo was very strange but interesting. It really reminded me of old Mankind. You know, the one that used to hang around in boiler rooms and looked and acted like a psychopath. Even though this segment was very atypical current Mankind, it seemed to make perfect sense. Mick was great here, seeming very scary and unpredictable, and his clone, Mideon, was wonderful. Who would have ever thought Mideon could be a great actor? He really shines here, acting completely pitiful and believably. Great segment.

Kurt Angle's Three I's Lesson To The Rams

This was a great, flawless promo. Everybody in that crowd hated him as soon as the promo was over which was the whole point. Over the past months, Kurt Angle has proven himself to be one of the best on the mic in the WWF. His three I's thing is consistently hilarious, and he plays his character perfectly. He's charamastic, but hateable. I personally think that him and Jericho should get into a speaking fight as a promo. It would possibly be one of the greatest heel battles of all time, as both would be trying to outdo the other without going over the top. Ah, maybe someday...

Mankind with Fake Mankind #2

Not much difference from the first one. Just one more observation. Something that may not have been intentional, but is evident at least to me, is the fact that the two of them represent different sides of Mankind. The fake Mankind represents the pitiful side that can't do much for himself and is a complete loser. The real Mankind represents the crazy and sadistic side of him and is horrifying because we'll never know what his next move will be. Pretty interesting.

Chyna and Chris Jericho At The Signup Sheet

I know, there were two more sign-up skits, but they consisted of, "Want to sign up tonight against so-and-so? Really? Great, let's do it!" Unless it was just horrible, like Steve Blackman, I'd say something about it, but it was The Hardy's with Terri and Edge and Christian. They're all capable actors, so there's no need to go into detail.

This segment wasn't extremely different from the other two, but it featured great character work by Jericho and Chyna. Jericho is wonderful as his character and is one of the most natural heels I've ever seen. He somehow remains a heel and can make a crowd boo even though he acts very neutral and innocent. Much like Shane seemingly taking lessons from the Hardy Boyz for his epic match against Test last year, maybe Stephanie should take lessons from Jericho on how to be a good heel. We'll see. Chyna was perfect, seeming very menacing but warm at the same time. A perfect set-up for their upcoming match that night. You know you cared about that match after this promo.

Edge and Val Exchange After Their Match

What in the hell was the point of this? It seemed completely out of place and unnecessary. In this case, I don't think it was the wrestler's fault; it was just bad writing. Edge delivered his line fine and Val responded accordingly, but it just didn't ring right. I guess maybe we're all so used to angles that a genuine act of honesty and kindness can be downright awkward and strange. Sigh. In any case, good acting and horrid writing.

DX Backstage #2

Exactly like the other promo except Billy Gunn was actually more believable and X-Pac was even worse in this one. I already talked about Billy Gunn before, but I haven't mentioned X-Pac. Pac may be a pretty gifted athlete, but as an actor, he is generally horrendous. All his lines either come out as way over-the-top, way too soft and unimportant, or just boring and dull. I actually laugh at times when I watch him be in pain or anguish over something that happened. If you want to be a competent actor someday, take my advice: don't be like X-Pac.

Little Jericho/Chyna Exchange Just Before The Match

Just a brief thing here. Notice the chemistry between Chyna and Jericho? This is extremely important in acting, and these two have it. Think of any movie that you saw where you thought two actors genuinely loved each other or hated each other or even just seemed to work well together. They had chemistry, and Jericho/Chyna have it. Watch thse two over the next couple of months. We may see something really special from them in the near future.

Mankind With Fake Mankind #3

Pretty much the same as the first two. This is when I started getting tired of this thing. No matter how good Mideon or Mankind are, you can't keep something going forever. Unfortunately, they didn't stop after this one, but they closed it fittingly. I will admit, the Chinese Water Torture was pretty funny, but it came too late in this drawn-out skit.

X-Pac And Hunter Do Their Thing

Well, I think you know what I'm going to say here. X-Pac was way too relaxed in this one, and Hunter was great. Ignoring X-Pac for the moment, let's think about Hunter's acting. He has really gotten good over the time he's been heel. In all honesty, I think he's one of the best heels in the late '90s. We really have learned to hate him, and he's natural enough at it so you accept him. So, some more advice if you want to be a good actor: Ignore X-Pac, watch HHH.

Outlaws And X-Pac Doing Their Thing

I'm sure you know what I'm going to say, but I'll sum this up in a couple of quick sentences. Good work Billy Gunn. OK work, Road Dogg. X-Pac, wrestle and don't act.

Mankind With Fake Mankind #4

OK, why is still on? This is basically like sitting through most dumb comedys of our time. A couple of good jokes here and there, but in general, it's the same lame thing over and over again. Once again, Mankind and Mideon were fine, but couldn't do anything in general. At least Mankind left the room in the second part of this skit. My god, this skit might be over. Yeah right.

Mankind And Tori In The Hall

This was one of the genuinely funniest things I've seen in my life. After a lot of lackluster promos, this was heaven. Mankind was simply perfect in this. If you want to see an example of perfect, hilarious acting, watch Mankind. He does exactly what Mankind would do: be a loser and be way too obvious and outgoing. What makes it even better is that Mick Foley is such a good actor that he said everything innocently and naively and pulled it off perfectly. He is truly gifted. Tori was adequate and filled the role fine. I would actually like to see Tori have some more acting roles. She's one of the talents in the WWF that has yet to really show their acting skills. Of course, they might be horrible, but I have a feeling she's pretty damn good. We'll see.

Fake Mankind Gets Ambushed

This isn't really a promo as it consists of someone walking into a room and beating up on someone, but I thought I'd take the opportunity to talk about Kane here. Kane, when he needs to be, is a wonderful actor. Some of the stuff he did with his "brother" was incredible, and what makes it so special is that he does it all (mostly) without talking. It's all body language. You can't even see his face, so he's got a handicap there that actually adds to his character instead of hindering it. In this promo, Kane was basically angry, so he didn't so much fine acting here, but watch for when Tori gets hurt in the ring. It's amazing that you can tell he's in pain with no sound or expression on his face.

HHH Gives A Pep Talk

This was like the rest of the DX promos tonight except that Road Dogg reached a new level of bad for him in this skit. Sounding like he was trying to act but couldn't, Road Dogg blabbered like an idiot for a minute. "We'll stick together" repeated over and over again? Good work, Roadie. You know, I shouldn't be so harsh on him, considering he didn't write it, but his delivery really makes it worse. Watch and you'll see what I mean.

The end of the show was basically a big match that culminated with Mick hinting to Cactus Jack's return. It was a great match story-line wise, but didn't do anything with promos, so I won't go over it here. However, Mick and HHH's expressions at the end of the show are priceless. Overall, the show was pretty damn good. It flowed nicely, but in general, the promos were pretty mediocre. However, some like the Mick/Tori and Jericho/Chyna were true masterpieces. If you have this show on tape, it provides for a great two hours of sports entertainment and a great couple of promos within those two hours.

Nitro is coming sometime tomorrow. In general, I'll do a new update on Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays CRZ and my time permitting. It'll make sense once this column gets into full swing. By the way, e-mail me! I promise I'll read everything. My e-mail is dmikester@mediaone.net. This column can't evolve wothout your input, so e-mail me with ideas, gripes, and just general comments. See ya tomorrow, or if I'm crazy, later tonight.

Dmikester
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