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| Guest Columns | Dan Doomsday |
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THE DEVICE After two long weeks, finally Dan Doomsday HAS COME BACK TO THE INTERNET!!! Yeah, it's been a while, but this is still the most electrifying column in sports entertainment today, the Device, and now we're on the PRO-WRESTLING ANGLE, as well as those other sites. And you know what? I'm still the World's Most Dangerous Columnist, I'm still the Pride of 2dope, I'm still one bad mammajamma, and I'm most definitely still Doom Sexy the Shannon Killer, which reminds me...
DOOMSDAY ON MOVIES: This week's pick is A Family Thing, starring Robert Duvall and James Earl Jones. It's a good movie, where Duvall finds out that his biological mother was black, and must come to terms with that knowledge and save his relationship with his half-brother Jones. It's one of those "I laughed, I cried" deals, and it's damn good. DOOMSDAY ON MUSIC: I caught Kid Rock at the Hammerstein Ballroom last night, and let me tell you, that man busts his ass on the stage. His show was wild, and then some. What was cool was the way Kid mixed in a little bit of everything from AC/DC to CCR, Grand Funk Railroad, and Hank Williams, Jr. I survived in the crowd, but it wasn't easy, especially when a crowd surfer landed on my head. Still, I had a great time. Unfortunately, though, I missed out on a key part of the Kid Rock experience. I want to send some serious "Get Well" wishes out to Joe C., who has stopped touring with the Kid. Apparently, his degenerative disease is getting the better of him at the moment. Get well soon, man. DOOMSDAY ON BASKETBALL: NBA Season kicks off tonight, and I'm psyched. Unfortunately, my Lakers are starting the season without Kobe Bryant and Robert Horry, but they've still got Shaq Diesel in the middle, and that might not be enough against the Jazz tonight, but it'll be plenty against most of the teams in the league, especially the Showstopper's sorry-ass Bulls. DOOMSDAY ON FOOTBALL: Well, the Jets had a bye this week. Considering how they've been doing lately, I guess we can call that a moral victory. C'mon! J, E, T, S, JETS, JETS, JETS, JETS!!!! All right, now, it's time for the Device. Now, I'm not sure how this one's gonna go, so I'm just gonna write and see what comes out. One things for sure though...
WCW was better off without Vince Russo and Ed Ferarra. There, I said it. I'm not saying that because of the added sex. I laughed my ass off during the Outsiders vs. Women match from last week's Nitro. It was great, and it'll probably help WCW's ratings in the long run. I'm not saying that because of the shorter matches. I think that 5 or 6 minutes is enough time for a guy like Benoit to do himself justice in the ring, and I think that shorter matches might even benefit the highspot wrestlers, because they'll be able to work better highspots without having to worry about exerting themselves too much in the ring. It will definitely help the brawlers like Stevie Ray, Meng, and Brian Knobs, because it will keep their act from getting old. So, what's my beef? Well, for all that Russo and Ferrara are adding to WCW, they're not adding the thing they were brought in to add. What's wrong? THE STORYLINES STILL AREN'T MAKING SENSE!! In fact, THEY MAKE LESS SENSE! Example: Ric Flair, who's a face, is feuding with the Filthy Animals, who are supposed to be heels, over what they did to David Flair, who is also a face. David Flair is feuding with Diamond Dallas Page, who is supposed to be a heel, but Dave is using a crowbar, which should make him a heel. Dave also takes that same crowbar to members of the Filthy Animals, who are supposedly heels, but the crowd boos Dave when he hits an Animal with the crowbar, meaning that Dave is a heel and the Animals are faces. The Animals are still faces when they feud with the Revolution, because Benoit, who is definitely a face, is also feuding with the Revolution, which means the Revolution members are most definitely heels. But the Animals are heels when they wrestle Harlem Heat, right? And what about when they wrestle Sting and the Total Package? Is anyone else getting confused? Now, don't get me wrong. I'm all for tweeners. But with one little condition: THEY HAVE TO BE ABLE TO WORK THE MIC!! Eddie seems to be the best mic worker of the bunch, but even he doesn't really get over on the mic. Frankly, I think they should stay as faces, as highspots seem better received when they come from faces. But that's just me. The Filthy Animals have to be either faces or heels, bottom line. Back in the WWF, things are going quite swimmingly without Misters Russo and Ferarra. I'm really enjoying Test's storyline as of late. I've been big on this guy ever since July, and I'm still really impressed. By surrounding himself with the Mean Street Posse, Shane McMahon, the British Bulldog, and Stephanie, Test has everything: a hated opponent, a comical opponent, a romantic storyline, and a guy who's not afraid to put his ass on the line. And with a direct link to Vinny Mac, I wouldn't be surprised to see Test make his way into the World Title Picture after Survivor Series, or at least a feud with DX. It could even be the same thing if Triple H comes out of Survivor Series with his title intact. Meanwhile, Triple H is coming into his own as the top heel in the company. Having DX back together helps, as nothing says "heel" like a four-on-one beatdown. Besides, the reunited heel DX has revitalized the careers of X-Pac and the New Age Outlaws. Despite the initial excitement that surrounded the Outlaws' reunion, the NAO were definitely stagnating. They couldn't do anything that they hadn't already done as faces, so the heel turn should open some some new doors for them. As for X-Pac, most people seem to hate the guy, so it made sense to turn him heel. Besides, it gives him back that degenerate attitude, which he needed. I think we'd all had enough of X-Pac's "big heart." Heck, we're talking about a guy who ran down to save Howard Finkel from Jeff Jarrett. That's not a degenerate, that's a joke! This X-Pac is no joke, and we'll get to see that in upcoming weeks. But what role will Chyna play in the DX reformation? She probably won't be a member. Frankly, I'd expect to see Miss Kitty join DX, turning on Chyna and keeping Chyna as a face. Frankly, Chyna is one of the best things the WWF has going right now, doing the whole "making strides for women" thing, not to mention feuding with the always-entertaining Chris Jericho. I wouldn't be surprised to see Jericho come away from Survivor Series as the IC Champion, with Chyna being betrayed by DX, Miss Kitty, or both. Oh, and for the record, I loved those "Master" and "Slave" shirts from RAW. The Bottom Line (TM Scott Keith): Maybe I'm being a bit harsh on WCW, but before Vince and Ed jumped, I was enjoying WCW more, and now I'm enjoying the WWF more. That doesn't reflect too well on the new creative team, but you can't judge them on the past two weeks. Only time will tell if Russo and Ferarra have the right stuff to turn WCW around. Until we find out (and probably for a while after that), I'm Dan Doomsday saying...
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