Greetings and salutations all! Welcome to the second edition of Positively Petes! Where we don't ask "who's next", or "who's first", but more of "who's got my sandwich"?!

Watching my tape of last night's RAW (damn you TSN!), I've come to many conclusions:

1. HHH has still got it!

2. I officially don't give a shit about the Fatal Fourway.

3. Taz is already just another victim and will soon join Tank Abbot.

4. Eddie sure does look like E.T. when he's wrapped up in blankets.

5. Steven Regal's gimmick could possibly WORK. And if it saves Jericho from the possible fate of jobbing to X-Spunk, all the better! Hoorah for Lord Regal!

And lastly...

6. Hunter has STILL got IT!

All in all, it wasn't a bad final episode for USA, not a GREAT one, but not bad. Hunter's teasing of Kurt, Regal's segment, and Eddie's apparent drop of the Still Smokin' impressions were nice pieces of entertainment, but wrestling wise, nothing really stood out.

And I'm glad to see that the WWF was able to slip in some "last RAW on TNN eeeeeeeever!" plugs. Hopefully with Smackdown! they'll have more freedom to plug their move to The "National" Network.

Am I waiting to see Chyna in Playboy? No.

Am I waiting to see pirated scans of her pictorial in Yahoo's plethora of nude wrestling women websites? You're damn right! ^_-

Always had a soft spot for the 9th wonder, even before the chin-job.

Trust me, my weird attraction to tall & built women doesn't stop with her. (NO, NOT Nicole Bass! >_<) And it'll be interesting to see why she's The Box The Game Came In all these years. (say, who started that joke anyways?)

My feelings on Unforgiven are shaky...

On one side you have two proven tag team wonders, E&C and The Hardyz, in a cage match for the titles, and a hopeful revenge for Taz in a strap match, and even a possible debut of Raven in the main event. (oh yeah, and that Austin guy too...)

But on the other side, you have me ending up watching it in a bar that'll probably have no sound at all. That, and a 4-way that I still just don't care about. The WWF has pushed HHH/Kurt/Steph so far that I don't give a rats ass about who holds the top strap. It almost makes me believe Russo when he says those gold plated belts are nothing more than props.

But then I beat my head into the wall and it subsides.

I want to be able to buy Benoit or even Kane in a title match. Hell I'd even like to be able to be entertained by the idea of 'Taker in a title match. But the WWF just didn't give much push into this foursome, it almost feels like a crappy version of WM2k's main event. Plus The Rock being involved is more than enough for me to be turned off. I'm sorry, but the guy basically has about as many moves as Hogan did in his heyday. Kinda pisses me off seeing the same old song & dance every single matchup. Same reason why I'm starting to grow tired of The Dudleys.

But still, if things go as I hope, Raven aids Kane in grabbing the title and beating the snot out of the Badass, and The Rock is revealed to be the Hit & Run culprit (C'mon! It actually makes sense! Austin is out of the way and thus The Rock becomes the supreme fan fave.) and thus feuds with Austin over who is beloved more by the fans.

But then, knowing the Big Two in letting us down in some possibly good swerves, Nudeon, or whatever he's called now, will make a run-in during the main event.

Also, am I the only guy smelling a Nudeon vs Rich, Evening Gown Rules match if the WWF actually coaxes the Tagi Alliance to appear at Survivor Series..? Add a Sue vs Kelly, Mud wrestling match and a Rudy vs Blackman, Hardcore Bootcamp Rules match and you got a PURE gold PPV card!

...PURE monkey crap, actually.

While over in WCW... Nope, sorry, didn't watch the PPV, and I don't see Nitro until midnight, so like the Unforgiven 4-way, I don't give much of a shit.

Gimmick suggestions of the week? Yeah, lose those damn pants Val!

Can somebody please explain why a Samoan hip hop wrestler is named after a class of Sumo wrestler? Never bothered to ask, but lately Rikishi is showing up to be another fan fave who doesn't do a lot of work...

Hrmm... Does "Less wrestling" truly equal "More fan admiration"? You guys let me know!

Okay, that's it for this week! I promise the next time I'll try and make it longer. ...Huh, that sounds familiar. ^_^;

Go forth and be Kurtful!