FULLY LOADED PREVIEW

T&A and Trish v Hardy Boyz and Lita

Hey didn't they do this on Heat a while ago? Oh well (btw from the clips on RAW didn't the Lita/Test parts look freakily like Rey-Rey v Nash). Anyway these two teams have been feuding since before Judgement Day due to Vince being an idiot a letting the Hardyz slip into jobber status. Anyway things have picked up a bit thanks in part to the Lita/Trish feud which is SOOOO more interesting than the Hardyz and T&A. On RAW Lita did a totally awesome bump of the ladder which would of ruled if Jeff had of done. On Smackdown these two teams collided in another 6-Man Tag Match but T&A with Val and Hardyz with Rikshi. Hardyz won that one with their trademark ending, Matt's pinned, Jeff breaks up with Swanton Bomb, and Matt pins. The heels did an all right heel beatdown until Lita made the save only to get beaten up as well.

On to the match, hmm lets deluded ourselves by pretending that Vince is planning another ***** match between the Hardyz and Edge & Chirstain at Summerslam so it would make sense for the Hardyz to win to build them up, well I guess that means T&A are winning. Hey I could care less as long as we get an ECW quality catfight between Lita (who is probably the most over women since Chyna in the hey day of (face) D-X) and Trish (oh baby), however I wouldn't be surprise if one Steven Richards showed up. So my prediction T&A win in screwy fashion by pinning Matt (he's the least over).

Al Snow (w/ Head, w/o a hope in hell) v TAZZ (w/ extra tall boot lifts)

So Snow's the first jobber to be bulldozed down by the PATH OF RAGE (TM ECW) which has been costing numerous faces matches against Canadians i.e. Rikshi with the wicked camera shot. Oh well. TAZZ to be honest is in a no win situation when he must win, if he wins people say "so what" if he loses people will lose all respect for him. As much as I'm a Snow mark TAZZ MUST KILL Al in 3 minutes flat, Al doesn't get a lick in, just Suplex, Suplex bang TAZZMIZZON Snow taps. Sorry Al your just another victim.

Intercontail Title Match (Cage Match): Val Venuis (c) v Rikshi Phatu

God what have we done to deserve this? Okay this flared up when Rikshi knock Val of the OvalTron then did a splash of the stage to Val, which kinda ruled. Things just got...more...boring after that. They had a few brawls. However on Rikshi's night off from rubbing is fat...arghhhh my eyes my beautiful eyes (there brown if you want to know) into Val's face (see I told you he hadn't shaken off his porn gimmick) and our night off from watching them fight. He beat Benoit for the Intercontail Title...well f*ck you Vince. At KOFTR these two met in the semis, which killed the tournament and the PPV dead. Rikshi won but not after receiving a brutal beating at the hands of Val and OH MY GOD IT'S...IT'S THE STEEL STEPS, SERIOUSLY THEY WEIGH 400,300,200 NO 100 IBS. A few weeks later in a decision that could only be made under the influence of chickens Vince effectively blew this match off by having Val go over for the IC Strap via an awesome TAZZ camera shot. They've been steadily building up this match since then (HA!) which hit it's crescendo on RAW when Val chucked Scotty of the stage, that ruled. Then on Smackdown they brawled to the back during a 6-Man tag match. To me this has bad idea written all over it, as Val's going for a bad ass dominate heel imagine and there's no way he'll be able to pull it off against Rikshi. Who'll win? Er you could seriously toss a coin to find out it's that close, however I'm going with Rikshi as we all know he's going to the Snuka Splash of the top.

Tag Team Title Match: Suicide Blondez (c) v APA

Note: Vince had planned to give us a Hardyz/Blondez Ladder match but because of CRZ's moaning about the APA being the No. 1 contenders he scrapped the match, please send all hate mail to CRZ. (Geez, most people wait to get at least ONE column printed before making up shit about me... - CRZ)

Well this sort of started when the APA won a battle royal to become No.1 Contenders. I think Faarooq got injured (hamstring I've heard) so the feud was put on hold for a week while CRZ kept bitching about how the APA were the number one contenders. Well CRZ got his wish when Two Weeks ago, Foley (while in S.E Asia) gave the APA their title shot. However poor Chirstain (in the best segment of the show) came down with the sniffles (NASTY!) so unfortunately they could not defend there tag titles so Edge was forced into singles competition where the Tag Titles WEREN'T on the line, SINGLE MATCHES RULE! Then on Smackdown a similar thing happened, after poor Edge was brutally attacked by the Rock meaning Chirstain had to face Faarooq alone, oh well. Anyway on RAW this feud pro... actually nothing much happened Edge pinned Faarooq after Benoit had whacked him right in the back with a steel chair (YESSS!). Then on Smackdown the Blondez proved how manly they are by drinking loads of those drinks with the little umbrellas in. The APA went looking for them only to find they had gone. The APA leaves only to be punked out in a hit and run attack by the Blondez.

As you can see I'm a huge E&C mark, a huge one. And during this feud you can see why, they have been brilliant, the only thing I'll say is that I was hoping that they would of taken the piss out of The APA business, that would of ruled. They have been playing the scared heel thing like gods and to be honest there easily the most over team in the world today so I'm going with E&C winning in some screwy fashion.

Main Event Match 3: Big Scary, The Scooter Killer v Kurt Angle

This as you may remembered started after Angle cost The Undertaker and Kane the tag straps against E&C. Of course he wasn't (as they say on the streets) "dissing" the Undertaker, oh no he thought it was Chainz and besides he was only helping his friends (FRIENDS RULE!). On Smackdown after beating Jericho good Kurt went backstage to celebrate and ended up throwing a load of shit all over The Undertakers bike (insert Fat Undertaker joke of your choice) a scared Kurt ran for his life. On the following RAW, The Undertaker called Kurt out. Kurt came out and offered him a lovely Scooter "to clean up his image" but The Undertaker rejected (You should of offered Donuts Kurt) then preceded to OH MY GOD HE'S JUST KILLED THE SCOOTER (YOU BASTARD) er then raised his arm (UT never gets tired of that). On the following Smackdown Kurt interfered in UT's match with HHH. He was aiming to hit Hunter with a sledgehammer but he missed and hit Chainz, The Undertaker, forcing UT to (shock) job. On RAW a furious UT demanded Angle tonight and despite Kurt's protests that no one wants to see them fight (I know I don't) Foley booked The No-Selling Brothers Grim Badass against Kurt and Hunter. Kurt and UT brawled to the back. On Smackdown Angle declared that he was scared no more and then preceded to get DQ against Kane. Later on he ruined The Undertaker's Beautiful Titan Bike which something (The Swine). The UT then followed Kurt to the back whom proceeded to jump him with a wrench.

As you may of guessed I'm hardly over excited about this match as the feud has been shit, oh no Kurt's ruined a lazy Texas gay biker DUDE's bike gosh that makes a main event feud, one word SNOOOORE! Kurt playing scaredy cat is shit as well (although very funny) and the fact he's no longer scared screams to little to late. But no matter how bad this feud has been this match will be worse what with UT no selling all Kurt's moves, Kurt acted scared (you know it'll happen). However I think the Undertaker is still enough of a company man to do the job for Kurt so a screwy Kurt victory is my prediction.

Main Event Match Number Two: Chris Jericho v Triple-H in a Last Man Standing Match

Oh baby, this is the stuff dreams are about. This match should be a classic and could easily be the show stealer. This all goes back to when Jericho on a long distant Smackdown called Steph "a dirty trash bag, bottom feeding Ho" to get back at her for forcing him into a handicap match with DeVince'sBitchesationX. On the following RAW, Triple-H was set to defend his wife's honour (or spelled honor if your surname's Jericho) in a non-title match against Chris Jericho. However Chris had other ideas and provoked Hunter into putting the title on the line. Jericho of course won via a Hebner fast count. However Hebner reversed his own decision, putting the title back on Hunter. After that things...slowed...down as Jericho was put back into mid-card and was reduced to just calling Steph names. However this feud was finally brought to boil when Jericho kissed Stephy Bear during his KOFTR 00 QF against Angle. Triple-H was furious, however just to piss off Hunter even more Jericho cost Trip a chance to bag a shot at the World Title. Hunter went on a war path, demanding Jericho at every turn. However Jericho was really getting screwing about with Triple-H even costing him a match against the Brooklyn Brawler. However 2 Weeks ago Trip got his own back as he laid the perfect trap. Steph went out and tried to seduce Chris to lure him out so D-X could jump, however Chris didn't fall for it. In the back X-PAC called it a stupid plan, so Hunter challenged him to a match. During the match Jericho came out to interfere only to find out IT WAS A SETUP ALL ALONG (TM Vinny Roo) and proceeded to get the living shit beaten out of him by D-X with a little help from a sledgehammer. Jericho was absent from Smackdown and was not due to compete on RAW although he did get Foley to make the match Last Man Standing. However he did show up on RAW, and preceded to lay a Y2J-BEATING that the Game will NEVER EVER FORGET AGYAIN. On Smackdown Jericho said he wanted in to the "Just beaten Hunter to an each of his life" club. H got a chance I the Main Event as he with the Rock went against Trip and Benoit. Jericho lost when the Rock got DQ but he did put Trip in the Walls of Jericho.

The match itself should be a brutal ***** classic brawl although Triple-H's back injury might hindered that. Except to see Trip concentrate on Jericho's ribs as well. Also it's worth remembering that Triple-H will need some time off after this match because of his back injury so what ever happens Triple-H will probably get beaten up. I myself smell a double turn which means that Steph and possibly X-PAC turn on Triple-H, whatever happens this should be a classic.

World Title Match: Rock (c) v The Canadian Wife/Husband Snatcher Chris Benoit (If Rock is DQ Benoit wins the belt)

Benoit is in the Fucking Main Event...What took them so fucking long? Well this all started when Benoit helped his "Friend" against The Rock by destroying the Rock which was SOOOO awesome. On the Smackdown after Benoit demanded a match against The Rock for the World Title only for Foley to make a 6-Man Tag-Benoit and Edge & Chirstain v Rock, Latino Heat and mamaSLUTia, which the faces won when Chyna pinned Chirstain. However on the following RAW Shane (who was in charge as Foley was absent) booked Rock v Benoit and if Benoit won he would get a Fully Loaded Title Shot. Benoit won of course when the Rock tapped like a little girl to The Crippler Crossface. On the following Smackdown er nothing much happened Benoit faced Eddy and Chyna (and lost by DQ) however everything flared up again on RAW during the 6-MAN tag match pitting The Canadians v Rock and The APA WHEN Benoit pasted Rock with some VISCOUS Chair shots, that ruled. However the Rock went on a backstage rampage destroying Benoit with a chair then Rock Bottoming him on a Limo. On Smackdown the DQ cannot change hands on a DQ rule was scrapped by Foley and just to show that the Rock might get himself DQ, the Rock got himself DQ in the Main Event. However afterwards The Rock put Benoit in The Shitty Sid Crossface, which Benoit tapped out to. This match should be excellent. I get the feeling that this will be like the Iron Man Match very, very technical (well for a Rock match) with outside brawling kept to the minimum. On who wins well some people think perhaps The Big Show will interfere causing The Rock to get DQ and cost him the belt. Let me say that would be shit and besides Benoit isn't ready to be champ. So I'll say Rock wins but Benoit snaps destroys the Rock with a Ladder setting up A Rock/Benoit Ladder Match at Summerslam.

All in all Fully Loaded has the potential to be one of the greatest PPVs of all time, please don't fuck it up Vince.