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Mark Coale

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FROM THE DARK SIDE
Déjà Vu All Over Again

Once we found out that Chris Benoit and friends (no calling them the Radicals here) were indeed going to the WWF, I had a grand fantasy.

They would come in, kick some serious DX behind and then all develop a mysterious cramping in their hands, the kind that makes you stick up four fingers and bend back your thumb.

Benoit would get on the stick and make some cryptic references here to taking care of business and how someone else would be joining them shortly. You know, as soon he got his release from Hell, ... I mean WCW.

Then 20,000 people would all go "Whoo!" in unison and the smart marks would salivate at the chance of the Nature Boy escaping from the limbo in which he was stuck and find some creative freedom working for Vince McMahon.

Well, it's been about a month since Benoit and company made their debut on RAW. And, unfortunately, it looks like Flair is happy (for the moment) in Atlanta and won't be bolting anytime soon.

But, after watching WWF TV for the last couple weeks, it looks like the Defectors really have turned into the new Four Horsemen.

Sure, stick any quartet together and you're tempted to call them the New Four Horsemen. Easy E almost did that with the Heel Horsemen that were going to feud with Flair and company, but mercifully, that never happened.

The Horsemen (1985-6 variety) may not have invented the formula, but boy, they perfected it. Really, really good wrestler as leader, almost as good wrestler as lieutenant and henchman (later to be the role known as the Enforcer) and a highly proficient tag team that also worked as insurance for the top man.

Not only did the Original Horsemen have this down pat (Flair, Tully, Ole and Arn), but so did the only version to really rival them for in-ring competence (Flair, Windham, Arn and Tully). It never really worked with Luger in the second banana, and let's all forget the names Mongo or Roma.

Let's examine what he have now with 4H2K in the WWF and darned if doesn't fit the bill to a tee.

Benoit is Flair. Yeah, the charisma doesn't match up, but who else is really in Flair's league? And Benoit is one of maybe five people that could match the Nature Boy's skill in his prime.

Eddy is the second banana. This may be a function of his injury, but darned if Eddy isn't great as the sneaky interfering guy at ringside. He is one of the all-time best people at slinking around the ring. And the injury has allowed him to show the kind of mike skills most of us forgot he had. Keep Mr. "Cheat to Win" on the stick and some of us will get all misty-eyed for Art Barr.

Malenko and Saturn are the tag team. Okay, I admit Perry Saturn is not what I would consider "Grade A Horsemen" material. I respect his ability in the ring and his adoption of a new style after his knee injury, but something just seems wrong. Malenko, however, is like Tully Blanchard all over again, but an even better worker. But man, are Malenko and Saturn developing a great tag team. The leg lariat-Tiger Suplex combo from Smackdown was amazing.

(In a perfect world, it would be Jericho in 4H2K and not Saturn. Because Jericho and Eddy would be like the reincarnation of the all-too-short lived Love Machine/Guerrero team. And Malenko would be free to really become Tully as a singles wrestler.)

But the similarities don't end with just the match-ups. Look at the classic Four Horsemen-like beat-downs they have given Too Cool and Riksihi of late. Hey, maybe they are so into being the Horsemen, they saw a really fat guy with blond hair and thought he was their Dusty. And hey, you could argue that Too Cool are the Rock and Roll Express. Maybe it really is 1985 again.

Come Monday morning, don't be surprised to find out the Benoit, Malenko and Saturn stole the show at No Way Out. After all, the Four Horsemen made a good card great during the height of the NWA and what's to say that 4H2K doesn't do the same.

Now, if we can just get Flair on the Underground Wrestling Railroad. Then again, the way HHH has been stealing Flair's signature moves, all we need is the theme from 2001 and for HHH to break out his old aristocrat robes and we might not need Mr. Flair all that soon.

Mark Coale
O-Goshi Studios - Popular Culture Journalism For the Next Millennium

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