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/wrestling /guests /Chechourka |
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/wrestling /guests /Chechourka |
| Guest Columns | Justin Chechourka |
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DREAM NITRO Live From Las Vegas it's Monday Nitro. . . Your Hosts Scott Hudson and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. Scott Hudson: "Tragedy Struck earlier today when Tony Schiavone and DJ Ran, and Rikki Rachman got stuck in the elevator of the MGM Grand!" Bobby Heenan:"Tony did tell us to tell you viewers that this is the greatest Nitro of all time!" Hudson: "Hogan vs. Sting for the Championship belt!" Heenan: "And KISS will play tonight!" Hudson: "Let's get to the action and stop all our talking!" First Match: Eddie Guerrero and Juventud Guerrera. This match starts off fast paced as both men are on top of there game. Hudson: "Lock up. Eddie puts Juvy in a side headlock, to the ropes spinning back breaker. Side suplex by Eddie and toss out of the rope." Heenan:"I like Eddie, he takes control and is viscious." At that moment Sid Vicious comes to the ramp but as he makes his way down the ramp he slips and falls. He begins crying and heads to the back saying something about Goldberg. Both Eddie and Juvy are stunned by Sid's fall and don't know what to do. Finally Mickey J tells them to continue. Heenan (Tyring to get Hudson's attention so he will continue his play by play) "Guerrera is now in control and hits the head scissors. Juvy heads to the top but his attempt at a missile dropkick is met with a dropkick of Eddie's." Hudson: "Wow that was amazing." Heenan: "Don't count out Juvy he is one tough kid. I like Juvy he takes control and is vicious." Hudson: "Juvy down after a Frankensteiner. Eddie attempts a frog splash but Juvy raises his knees. Juvy throws Eddie of the ropes to a running lariat. Goes for the Juvy driver and slams Eddie to the mat. First pin attempt good for two. Eddie kicks out only to be thrown out of the ring. Juvy with a suicide dive to the outside but misses and lands on the steel guard rails." Heenan: "Those guard rails win every time." Hudson: "We have to take a commercial break. . . oh wait this just in they are telling me that we will not be taking commercial breaks during matches anymore, Turner finally said he has enough money that he doesn't have to ruin matches by having commercials interrupt them." Heenan: "You mean the fans are actually going to get to see the wrestling?" Hudson: "Apparently so. Battle on the outside continues finally Eddie rolls Juvy into the ring and connects the frog splash for the win. Rey and Konnan come out to join Eddie for post match celebration. No Kidman though." Heenan: "I wonder where Kidman is." Commercial break. When we come back we see Kidman in the back with a woman. Hudson: "Who is that with Kidman it looks like . . .it is. . .it is Kimberly and boy does she have nice tits." Heenan: "If I could get in the ring with those I would come out of retirement." Suddenly Diamond Dallas Page comes bursting in and beats the shit out of Kidman and Kimberly. Heenan: "Apparently DDP has been going to the Savage school of Domestic disputes" Hudson: "With tits like that can you blame Kidman?" Heenan: "I know you haven't done very many Monday nights but you can't say tits on this show." Hudson: "Oh sorry. Well this just in we are going to have Sid vs. Goldberg for the Title of Millennium Man." Heenan: "Don't forget that we also have Hogan vs. Sting match and KISS is on the show tonight." Out of nowhere an old familiar voice comes from nowhere. Mysterious Vioce: "Hey Yo!!!" Huge fan pop as they realize it belongs to none other than Scott Hall. Hall: "Hey yo!! I don't know what all you people think about these guys that are the tag team champs but I am sick of them already. I say at Fall Brawl me and a partner that I get to choose will take them on for the tag team belts." And as suddenly as the voice came it went away. Hudson: "There was no mistaking that voice it had to be Scott Hall. He and a mystery partner have challenged Harlem Heat to a tag title match tonight." Heenan: "Who could his partner be?" Hudson: "I don't know but knowing Hall it could be anyone." Commercial Break We come back to the sounds of Rick Steiner coming out to the ring. Steiner: "If you want some bite me and if you don't like me come get some. Wait I got that all messed up." To late out come Vampiro. Hudson: "It looks like we are having an impromptu match!" Heenan: "If it was impromptu why is there a referee in the ring already?" Hudson: "Just go with it!" Heenan: "Okay!" Hudson: "Vampiro takes control early. Hits a wicked clothesline. Vampiro is relentless. Steiner whipped into the corner Vampiro follows in and puts the boots to him. Pulls Steiner out of the corner and goes for the death spike." Heenan: "Wow Steiner sucks!" Hudson: "Vampiro with the cover. 1. . .2. . .3 Ladies and gentleman we have a new television champion. Kiss is next!" Commercial Break Kiss takes the stage. Gene Simmons: "Hello Nitro fans!" He then sticks out his tongue. "We would like to introduce you to the KISS Demon." Out steps Brian Adams in full KISS outfit. Heenan: "Look it is Crush from Demolition." Hudson: "No it is the KISS Demon don't you listen?" Heenan: "Oh it looks an awful like Crush from Demolition though." Simmons: "I don't know about you people but I want to Rock and Roll all night long!!!!!" No crowd pop. KISS begins to sing when suddenly the Insane Clown Posse comes out and kicks there geriatric asses. Hudson: "What is going on here?" Heenan: "Apparently ICP doesn't want to Rock and Roll all night long." Hudson: "When we come back Chris Benoit will defend his title against Buff Bagwell." Commercial Break Out comes the Canadian Crippler to a huge pop from the crowd then followed by Buff Bagwell to an almost equal crowd pop. Heenan: "These are two fan favorites here." Benoit gets on the mic: "Buff you might be the Stuff but I have the gold and as long as you keep posing and not wrestling you will never have the right stuff." Buff looks sad and grabs the mic: "You might have the gold but I am Buff and I'm the stuff." This stupid thing gets no response. Hudson: "Lock up. Buff whips Benoit into the ropes and hits a huge drop kick. Attempts a pin for 1." Heenan: "That was a weak pin. Buff has to do a better job than that if he wants to beat Benoit. I like Beniot he takes control and he is viscious." Hudson: "Buff tries to whip Beniot into the ropes but it is reversed. Benoit follows it up with a splash. He gets behind Buff and hits a spectacular German suplex, then another, then another. Goes for the pin gets 2." Buff rolls out of the ring. Heenan: "Smart move by Buff he needs to get a break and get his composure." Hudson: "Baseball slide by Benoit to meet Buff on the outside. Whips Buff into the steel steps. Trys to whip him into the post but it is reversed. Buff moves the mat out of the way and piledrives Benoit into the concrete floor. Pushes Benoit back in the ring." Heenan: "Can't get the Gold by countout." Hudson: "Buff to the top. He is going to attempt the Blockbuster and he connects. We may have a new US champion. One. . .Two kick out by Benoit. Buff is shocked." Heenan: "I told you, you can't count out Benoit he is tough as nails." Hudson: "Benoit gets control. Verticle suplex. Now he is blowing some snot rockets on Buff. He picks Buff up and nails him with a shoulder breaker. Benoit goes to the top rope and does the diving headbutt and connects. One. . .two. . .three, Benoit retains his belt!" Commercial Break Mean Gene: "Hello Las Vegas!! I would like to bring out the eight time tag team champions. . . Harlem Heat!" Huge crowd pop. Booker T.: "You know Mean Gene suckas are always try'n to come after our belts, and Scott Hall is no exception. He can bring whatever partner he wants because this is my brother and we whip everyone. Now can you dig it?" Stevie Ray: "That's right this is my brother and those fruity booty's can't do nothin about it, ax anyone they will tell ya." Mean Gene: "Well thank you gentlemen, I think you can say that they are excepting Scott Hall's challenge at Fall Brawl." Commercial Break When we come back Sid is already in the ring. Sid: "Goldberg I am the Millennium Man," He continues to ramble but his words are indistinguishable "I am the master of the universe." We hear the music from Crush 'em. Heenan: "Da Man!!!!" Hudson: "Goldberg!!!" Huge crowd Pop. Goldberg makes his way to the ring but as soon as he steps into the ring Sid attacks. Hudson: "Sid is just pounding on Goldberg." Heenan: "That's because that's all he knows how to do." Hudson: "Sid whips him against the ropes put's Goldberg in the Cobra Clutch. Then slams him on the ground. Sid picks Goldberg up off the ground and chokeslams him." Heenan: "Sid is an evil man. Look at his eyes he is vicious I don't like him." Hudson: "Sid has Goldberg set up for the powerbomb. He lifts him up and slams him back to the mat. No way that Goldberg will get up from this. One. . . Two and kick out. Sid hits Goldberg but he just stands there and looks at Sid." Heenan: "It is like Goldberg is saying is that all you got?" Hudson: "Sid can't believe his eyes. Goldberg lifts Sid above his head and gives him the Goldberg Press Slam. Now the spear. Looks like it is jackhammer time. Sid is up and he is down. One. . . two . . .three. Goldberg wins!!" Goldberg grabs the mic: "I want everyone to know that the only thing that is next is the championship. I want the winner of Hogan and Sting at Fall Brawl." Hudson: "Goldberg has just issued a challenge to the winner of the Hogan/Sting match which is next." Heenan: "If I was either of those guys I would let the other win so I didn't have to face Goldberg." Hudson: "When we come back Hogan and Sting for the world title." Commercial Break When we come back a man is making his way down the ramp. He is wearing teal tights has a blonde flat top and it looks like a scorpion painted on his face. Huge crowd pop. Hudson: "Oh my goodness it is the old Sting, he is back!" Heenan: "Wow I can't believe it." Sting: "Whoooooooooooooooo! I am back and I am back in teal!" Then we hear the "Made in America" song. Out comes Hogan. Almost as huge crowd pop. Hogan: "You know Stinger, you deserve this title shot so now is your chance." Sting: "Let's do this!" Hudson: "This will go down as one of the great matches of all time. Hogan and Sting lock up. Hogan pushes Sting away showing who had more strength. They lock up again and once again Hogan pushes Sting away." Heenan: "Sting needs to use his speed against Hogan because Hogan is too strong for him." Hudson: "Another lock up and this time Sting puts Hogan in a side headlock. Hogan pushes him against the ropes and shoulder blocks him to the ground." The crowd is red hot and behing Sting. Hudson: "Lock up again this time Sting whips hogan against the rope and hits the back body drop. Picks Hogan up and whips him into the corner." Heenan: "Stinger Splash!!!" Hudson: "Whips Hogan to the other corner and goes for another splash but Hogan moves and picks Sting up for the body slam. He pushes Sting out of the ring." Heenan: "Hogan is smart. He is getting composed and working out his game plan." Hudson: "Hogan out to the floor. Fingers down Sting's back. Then a whip into the pole. Pushes Sting back into the ring. He whips Sting into the rope and connects with the big foot. Sting is out. Hogan off the ropes the big leg. . . Sting moves." Sting takes control with pattened Sting moves. Out of nowhere Eric Bischoff is out with a chair. Heenan: "What is Bischoff out here for?" Bischoff hits Sting with the chair which allows Hogan to regain control of the match. Hudson: "Does Hogan know what Bischoff did?" Heenan: "I don't know but I do know that I don't trust Hogan." Hudson: "Hogan grabs the chair and puts in over Stings head as he is laying in the middle of the ring. The Big Leg right on top of the chair. This is awful. Hogan led us all to believe he had changed but obviously nothing has." Unexpecteedly Bret Hart makes his way out of the crowd and pulls the ref out of the ring as he counts Sting out. Heenan: "What is Bret Hart doing here?" Hogan wondering what is going on gets off of Sting to investigate the dissapearance of the referee. Meanwhile Bischoff is yelling at Bret to leave the ring. Hudson: "Whatever the Hitman is here for it is not soemthing that Bischoff wants him here for. Wait Hart has got Bischoff." The Hitman is asking the crowd if they want him to hit Bischoff. The crowd goes crazy. But before he can hit him Hogan is out to make the save. Sting finally comes to and see that Hart is about to recieve a Bischoff chair shot. Sting grabs the chair from Bischoff's hands and nails him. Hudson: "Wow what a chair shot that Sting just gave Bischoff." Heenan: "He might never get up from that one." Bret Hart gets the upper hand on Hogan and puts him back in the ring where Sting awaits him. Hudson: "Stinger Deathdrop on Hogan. Now he is going for the Scorpion Deathlock." Hart rolls a recovered ref back into the ring who counts Hogan out. Hudson: "Ladies and Gentlemen we have a new Champion. Sting!!!" Hart: "Hogan I knew it was only a matter of time before you would turn again. Now I want a piece of you. People have said to me 'Bret why haven't you ever wrestled Hogan' I have told them it was because you were afraid to step into the ring with the Excellence of Execution. Now you don't have a choice. I have a contract right here that has me and you at Fall Brawl. What do you think of that?" A beaten Hogan has a shocked look on his face but does his usual break you in half motion and walks off. Hudson: "We are out of time. See you next week!" Justin Chechourka freelance Mail the Author |
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