Hey All! I have returned from my three week hiatus feeling renewed and a bit happier. I don't know what the hell happened to me...its not like I was uninspired. Quite the opposite, I have enjoyed wrestling like crazy the last few weeks...every since a genius named Paul Heyman joined my favorite fed, and brought a flavor of his amazing, but sadly all but defunct organization ECW. So no more excuses to offer up here, lets just get to the rants.

We are only a few weeks away from Wrestlmania and the past two weeks of television have been amazing. Last week was the best RAW I have seen in a long time, maybe ever. The highlight for me of course was the Eddy/Benoit match which was phenomenal, even more so if you read Perry Saturn's commentary and find out that Eddy was sick as a dog and throwing up all day...HOLY SHIT...well like Perry says..."HOW GOOD IS EDDY?" To which I answer...damn good. Too bad his very promising feud with Benoit has been nixed for this no heat match up with Test. Don't get me wrong, I have been impressed with Test's recent outings, well except for RAW where his "match" with HHH was just an excuse to further the Big Show/Kane & UT/HHH feud, emasculating Test once again...not a good move when you trying to push someone. But still he has brought a fire to the ring which I have never really seen in him before, but still I can't help but think that Eddy is just better than the European championship. Oh well, at least he has a spot on the WM card...and that makes me happy as hell...

Now as far as Benoit goes...I am a little confused...supposedly they are trying to turn him face, but yet they put him in a match up on RAW this week where he is still teaming with the heels...HUH? I realize it was to set up this Angle feud for a match at WM, and for this I couldn't be happier. I saw these men hook it up live at the Raleigh house show where I was lucky enough o have front row, and man it was a hell of a contest...so if we can get some of that on WM...I am certainly not going to complain at all...could be a show stealer...in fact I would bet on it...well for me anyway. Right now I don't think there are two better wrestlers in the WWF right now than Benoit and Angle...although Eddy if very close. I mean Angle has stand out matches every single week now. His recent outings against Austin and Rock were nothing short of phenomenal. Wow!! His talent just blows me away actually, and his promos are also amazing. Like JR said in his Ross Report, he has never seen anyone with Kurt's talent level at his experience level...and I agree. I mean does Angle look out of place in the Main Event...I think not...every match he looks like he belongs there...the man is amazing. Not that Benoit is anything to sneeze at either...quite the contrary. I love watching Benoit in the ring...it is always a treat to watch him dissect his opponent, to watch him sell his opponents moves, to watch him do those chops...man oh man I love those chops. So the idea of two of my now favorites hooking it up is very appealing to me, especially if they add the stipulation that it will be a #1 Contenders match, which I am thinking they will do, well at least they should do it.

Back to the Benoit as face issue...I guess putting him against Angle makes him the face by default, esp. with all the subtle and not so subtle croonings of Ross and Heyman about how amazing he is...which I completely agree with...but I still think that they should somehow hook him and Jericho up as a tag team...after WM...this will serve several purposes...First it will solidify Benoit's face status, because Jericho is totally beloved by everyone. Second, it will put new blood into the tag team division, and mix things up big time. Like I have written before, imagine the Hardys vs. Jericho and Benoit...or the Dudleys or Edge and Christian. I mean all of these are drool worthy match ups. This way those three teams can take a break from fighting each other and start an interesting feud with another great team.

Not that I am complaining about another 3 way dance between my three favorite teams at WM. In my mind this is the only way they could go. All three teams pull out the best from each other, and on the "biggest" PPV of the year, they could only face each other again. Now how do they top the TLC match from Summerslam. I have no idea...and honestly I don't think they can, but you can bet that between all six of those highly talented, innovative and flat out crazy men they are going to come up with some crazy shit for us to see.

Which leads me to the amazing tag team title situation that unfolded on RAW. Edge and Christian using their brains and "canceling" the flight reservations of the Dudleyz so they can get their title shots...then its Thug Life reunited!!! I swear to god, I don't even like Rhino but I was still marking out like crazy when he ran into the ring and gored Jeff Hardy. I think it was a combination of me missing ECW like crazy, but still getting a taste of it from Paul E doing his amazing commentating, and also knowing the history between Christian, Edge and Rhino that made me go crazy. That and the fact that Edge and Christian are now 6 time tag team champions. Whoo hoo...and then to make things even better, we get a second match where Christian and Edge have to come out and fight again...Christian twice in one night!!!! YES!!! This time the tag team champs take on the Duds in a super exciting match up which saw SPIKE DUDLEY come to the ring and do the freakin acid drop on the chair to Christian. Man oh man...I was freaking out...I can't remember the last time I marked out so hard. The best part was that I was a complete surprise...I had no idea that he was even being considered by the WWF. I LOVE SPIKE...and I was ecstatic to see him reunite with his "Brothers". And Paul Heyman's commentary was so damn awesome...but what was even better was the crowd reaction to Spike...they went crazy and started chanting E...C...Dub....totally amazing, and you know Heyman was probably beaming from ear to ear. I don't know what it was about Spike's debut but it just put a huge smile on my face, and every time I think of him jumping into Buh Buh's arms and kissing the top of his head while he does his goofy wave, I just grin from ear to ear....totally awesome mark out moment....

Side Note: I think that having Rhino as the super retarded thug that Christian and Edge can control to do their dirty work is a stroke of genius. Their little exchange back stage had me laughing my ass off...as my friend Jen said...it was like seeing a Rhino ECW promo without the cursing...instead of I am going to the fucking hotel to fucking maim some fucking people...he was like hotel...maim...very cool...

Getting back to Paul Heyman for a moment...I cannot tell you how much I love his commentating...and not only that his hand in the booking and writing is also evident and from what I see it is a step in the right direction. I was shocked when Lawler walked out, but to be honest, I don't miss him one bit. When Heyman started imitating JR. while Ivory beat up and beheaded a cardboard cut out of Chyna I was laughing my ass off. He actually puts over the talent that is in the ring, and makes you care about he action even more. I think one of the main reasons I was marking out for Rhino is because of Paul's commentating...he just has such a great enthusiasm...and its contagious as hell....Keep up the great work Paul...it great to see and hear you every week...and as long as he's there, and his guys keep invading the WWF and keep their ECW style...ECW will continue to live on...till a day sometime in the future where hopefully he may be able to start it up again...

What else...oh yes, Shane O' Mac is back...and I for one couldn't be happier...and I know a few other woman who are just as happy as me...I have missed the heir apparent so much, and I have been waiting for him to make his reappearance ever since they started this vile and disgusting angle with Trish Stratus. I am not going to bore you with a long diatribe about woman's rights and the objectification of woman and stuff like that...and I know that when it comes to wrestling there is hardly any such thing as poor taste, but having a woman get down on her hands and knees and bark like a dog is revolting to me. I was not even that disturbed that Vince made her strip...but the barking and Trish saying that Vince had no idea how far she would degrade herself for the right cause...well Trish...I think we have some idea. Now I am still hoping that she is doing this to somehow get into his good graces and she will then turn on him and join with Shane or something, but somehow I doubt it. All I know is I was sitting and watching this segment in complete horror and now every time I see Vince and Trish I want to puke...and we won't even mention the tongue kiss...which was enough to send me to the bathroom, hurling...yuck...but "the Hollywood sex scene" was a great way to get Shane back and I thought the set up to his match against Vince at WM was brilliant. Usually I am not a fan of anything that Vince McMahon takes part in on TV...because quite plainly I can't stand the man, but this was done well. HHH"s role as McMahon's lackey was a bit strange...but man he really looked like he was beating the shit out of Shane backstage. Good stuff, to set up a match that I am actually looking forward too...now my only request...please don't have Shane reunite with his dad again. I don't think anyone wants to see that bullshit again.

I cannot express how much I love William Regal as Commissioner. I never thought I would love anyone as much as Mick but to be honest, with Regal and prim and proper office with the picture of the queen, I haven't even thought about Mick. Also does he have a bad exchange with anyone...I mean the guy has chemistry with just about everyone. His little exchange with Eddy when neither of them could understand the other was so great...and I have to say...I am digging his sparring with Jericho in a big way, and I think they are going to have a solid match at WM...the good thing is WM is going to be in Texas where the fans actually have an appreciation for WRESTLING...so this match actually has a chance for some crowd reaction...because despite Jericho's personality he gets the pop for his entrance and his mike work, but then it falls off considerably when he actually starts wrestling. So I can't wait to see what chicanery Jericho gets into next week, although I can't imagine him topping the peeing in Regal's tea pot...that was classic...and in my opinion had Paul Heyman written all over it....

Was I the only one who nearly had a heart attack when Stevie came out to wrestle on RAW...and then even more of one when I realized his opponent was going to be TAZZ!! WHAT TAZZ ACTUALLY WRESTLING...IT CAN'T BE! I was so excited...until I realized it was just a set up for the stupid Rock to come out and be all pissed off about the stunners he received from Austin...man that sucked!!! First off I hate the Rock...I really hate the Rock...(Sorry Sharon...I have to go off on your man once again...please forgive me...although I know you have other things on your mind which are making you so happy that you won't have time to be mad at me.) I swear no matter what the WWF does, I cannot care about the Main Event at WM...and yes, I know most people can't wait for it, but I am not one of them. The only time the Austin/Rock situation is even remotely interesting is when Angle is involved...that's it...otherwise...YAWN...and this inclusion of Debra...please!! Are we idiots...are we really supposed to believe that Vince is now assigning managers to people...god could this aspect of the angle be any stupider...also I have not seen Debra do one thing that I could even remotely call managerial...walking around in high heels and a business suit, clapping and showing off your cleavage is not being a manager. If anything this is making me hate this angle even more...so I can't wait till the match already...and Rock can go off and do his movie, we don't have to see his no selling, not talent ass around for a while...GRRRRRRR...

Now Austin on the other hand had been amusing the hell out of me...not that he is much better than Rock in the ring, but at least he knows how to put a match together...Rock has no psychology what so ever...and I can't remember the last time he actually did a good promo...now Austin has been great in that area in my opinion. I loved his little interview with JR last week on Smackdown...I thought it was very solid and accentuated the things that we loved about Austin in the first place...Good work...

Onto the Brother's Grim...I love the Brother's together...I don't know why but I about died laughing when Undertaker asked Kane "Since when have you become the voice of reason?" when he tried to convince Undertaker not to attack HHH in the parking lot...hilarious...Unbelievably, I love the way this feud is shaping up...well except for the arrest part...I hate the arrest angle...it is so overdone...but besides that it has been great since the first time when Undertaker confronted HHH in the ring, to Hunter pushing the bike on his leg and sitting over him taunting him...it has been just great...I love when Undertaker is being a bad ass...what can I say...I find it incredibly sexy...so sue me...now in terms of delivering a good match...I am less hopeful about that but at least it was a fun little rivalry leading up to it...which lots of mark out moments for me at least between the two brothers....esp. When Kane was holding Stephanie over his head on the top of those stairs...that was hilarious as hell...

Now Kane vs. Big Show...I have to say...I honestly feel bad for Kane here...Big Show is just terrible in my opinion...I don't care how much weight they tell us he lost, or how much they say he has improved...I haven't seen it...and despite the opinion of my friend Tom who thinks Kane sucks...I think Kane is a VERY talented big man and he deserves better than to be stuck in this match which is almost doomed before it even starts...The only good thing is one of Big Show's biggest weaknesses is he does his moves very lightly because he is afraid of hurting people, but hopefully since he is facing a very large man he will actually work slightly stiffer and the moves won't look to bad...

Random thoughts:

Despite hating both Justin Credible and Xpuke...I think they fit well together...and I really like Albert with them. When Albert was with Test his size really didn't come across but standing beside these two...he looks huge...

For those of you who saw HEAT: They will give Xpuke the mic for like 10 minutes but won't let the Hardys talk? HUH!!!

Give me more Molly Holly!!! Did you see her perform her awesome end move on her teacher/mentor Dean Malenko on HEAT!!! Good stuff...she also has chemistry with just about everyone.

Ok, so since unmasking Tori, we haven't seen her or even heard her mentioned....not that I am complaining but what is up with that....

Along the same lines...Hey Paul...help them come up with a good storyline for RAVEN...and get him with a woman (not Tori) quick!!!

Congrats to Crash Holly...new light heavyweight Champion!!

Seeing all these ECW guys makes me just want more...where's my Jerry Lynn, where's my Tajiri...I can't wait for those guys to debut!!!

Speaking of ECW...have you seen Jason Jett aka Easy Money on Nitro...wow, he lost some weight and he is just amazing out there. I saw him bring an apathetic audience to their feet on Nitro...pretty impressive. I heard that Kid Kash was going to work a match with him...to bad WCW seems to be falling by the wayside...these guys are just too good to be working Indy shows....

Speaking of which...if WCW folds...what about guys like O'Haire, Kidman, Helms..etc...the true talents of WCW...where do they go?

One more thing...my bestest friend Sharon is about to set sail so to speak for jolly old England to visit a very sweet and wonderful Brit...and I just wanted to wish her a safe trip full of lots of adventures and good times...Love you girl...and I hope you have a blast and find everything you are looking for....

Wow...my column is done...now that wasn't so hard...I will see you next week...