Hey All! Don't know exactly what happened last week, I sent my column into CRZ on Friday but for some reason it never got posted (Sorry...I have a note from my doctor, though - CRZ)...but I did have a lot of thoughts about the Rumble going in, and now that its past, I have a lot to say about it as well...I am in a really good mood today...just thought I'd let you know...

Onto the Rants...

Well, as I wrote in my column, I was very looking forward to the PPV, and it ended up being even better than I thought it would be. Of course the match of the night in my opinion was the ladder match...no real surprise there except of course for it being even better than I thought it would be. A big HOLY SHIT to both of those guys for the totally innovative and creative bumps they took...esp. when Benoit did his suicide dive out of the ring into the chair...I was freaking out...that match just ruled!!! Every time I think that I can't worship Benoit more than I do, he does something like the ladder match or even his incredible performance on RAW which just makes me worship him all the more.

Benoit worked the majority of that match (of course, its not like the Big Show could have worked more than 2 minutes) and looked amazing out there...One thing I must say though...I hate when he is up against the Rock...don't get me wrong, I love when he gives Rocky those stiff chops and kicks, but Rock is just a no selling bastard when it comes to Benoit and it pisses me off. I spoke to my friend Lewis about this awesome match, and he said he didn't even notice Rock's no-selling because he was so caught up in Big Show's ineffectiveness...and that starts me on a whole different topic. But before I go off on that tangent, I am just curious as to where they are going from here with the Crippler...is he going to continue to feud with Jericho? Is he going to continue to lay down time and time again for the totally undeserving Rock? I'm sorry but the more I watch the Rock in the ring, the more he pisses me off. Not only is he a horrible seller, but the guy has no psychology at all, and his moves look so sloppy especially compared to Benoit. Plus it just pissed me off that after working his ass off in that insane ladder match, Benoit had to do the J.O.B. for the second day in a row...what the hell...down with Rocky!!! That's what I have to say...put Benoit and Jericho in the Main Event with Angle...and they can do a repeat of their excellent WM match from last year...now that's what I want to see...now before I get all the emails telling me that I am crazy, no one wants to see that...the marks don't want to see that...I don't care...this is what I want to see, irregardless of whether it would be a big draw or not...

Ok, onto the Big Show...I have to echo other sentiments on this one...if anything the guy looked fatter than ever before, but of course it could just be the outfit...but still he looked just as ineffectual and shitty as he did before he left...what the hell? Why is he back and immediately in a Main Event match? Why is he back at all? I know he is being paid some big bucks, I mean really big bucks to be in the WWF, but I think that the WWF needs to just cut their losses and be done with him. He will never be any good...he just doesn't have what it takes. I mean here this guy has been in OVW for how long, and he hasn't seemed to have improved at all. His little freak out at the end of the Raw match sucked...he doesn't even know how to do the big nasty bastard gimmick and that's supposedly who he is. I mean those chokeslams he was handing out were WEAK!!! The only person who sold it at all was...let me see...Benoit...of course...and now they are going to feud him with Jericho...who the hell wants to see this...in my opinion this totally undeserved push should have gone to Kane...especially after his incredible performance in the Rumble match itself...

The Rumble...I love this match, except for the year that Vince won...that was the worst Rumble ever...but last year it was great, and I was hoping it was going to be that good this year...and it was in my opinion. The best part about it was Kane...although Austin might have won, in my opinion, Kane was the true star...and I was so happy for him. First off we have the comedy bit with Drew Carey then we had monster Kane taking on 5 hardcore guys himself, each attacking a different part of him. I loved this and thought it came off really well and served to make Kane look incredibly strong. Then we have the great bit with the Honky Tonk Man...god, I was crying I was laughing so hard from this one...esp. when Kane shook his head after smashing the guitar over his head...This was great...then we have Undertaker and Kane working together, which made my night...it really did...These two are so much better when they work together...I was half hoping they would get on their knees and raise their hands up to each other...I would have marked out like crazy for that. But still, I really like them together a lot. And when they were standing there side by side in the ring and Scotty Too Hotty came out...that look on his face was priceless...So I'm so caught up in the action, it takes me a second to realize that shit, Kane's been in the match forever and he is still in it. My personal highlight was when he almost dumped Rock and Austin over...for a brief mark moment, I actually thought he had a chance to win...but of course I knew better...I knew it was going to be Austin...but just the fact that Kane eliminated the Rock cleanly and was the last man eliminated just ruled. Now I truly hope that this does lead to a giant push for Kane because hell the man deserves it. He worked 55 minutes with hardly a breather...I want to see Billy Gunn, the Big Show or half the other people in the match do the same...and they are not even 6"10 (well except for Show)...go Kane...hopefully now you will get what you truly deserve...

Other Rumble thoughts:

Why was Billy Gunn in with Austin, Kane and Rock at the end of the match...all I kept thinking of was that old Sesame Street song..."which of these people doesn't belong"?

Ok, the Hardys fighting each other...the Hardys fighting each other without shirts...DROOL...for some reason I just love this idea...I was having a total heart attack when they were going at it at the beginning of the Rumble...the only complaint I had...they should have been in longer...but I am very interested to see where this is going...they definitely didn't seem to be on the same page on RAW...and the APA has been looking better than I have ever seen them look, and Jeff Hardy selling things like he's a rag doll doesn't hurt either. But seriously, Bradshaw and Farooq have been looking quick (at least for them) and crisp...and I've been impressed. Now I see that both teams are split up for Smackdown and its Matt and Farooq vs. Bradshaw and Jeff...should be interesting to see where this goes...as long as they are actually giving the Hardys a real storyline, and maybe some personalities...I am a happy camper...

I sort of liked the whole Hardcore part of the Rumble...or maybe I just liked how Raven kept jumping on Kane's back and putting him in one of the most effective sleepers in a long time...

Why the hell was Tazz so disrespected...hell even the stupid Goodfather lasted longer than him...what did he stay in like 5 seconds...

Welcome back Al!!! Good to see Al back, esp. after his car accident...

I was happy to see Big Show eliminated so quickly even if it was by the Rock...and it was great to see Rocky get chokeslammed, even if Big Show's chokeslams suck!!!

Was Austin bleeding like a stuffed pig or what...I have to say I sort of marked out for Austin winning the Rumble wearing the crimson mask...

Ok these are my thoughts on the Rumble itself...now onto other matches...

I thought the opener was awesome...a nice good old fashioned wrestling match...and I was very happy to see the crowd get to into it despite the fact that no foreign objects were really used. Christian of course looked great out there, and I love when him and Edge do those "missed spots" spots...they always come off looking great. Even though I love Christian I was happy that the Dudleys won...it will make things more interesting in the long run...and I know a certain friend of mine...cough...Heather...cough...was having a total heart attack...Go Dudleys!! Although why they faced Lo Down on Raw is beyond me...

Kurt vs. HHH was a great match...I love Kurt Angle so much...his performance on Monday night was amazing. He does the best impression of Hunter I have ever heard...ever...he had me laughing my ass off..."instead of crying over spilt milk why don't you drink it like me" god the man is AWESOME. Anyway, I thought this was a really solid match, and unlike the cat fight on Smackdown, the one on the PPV was awesome...it was just vicious...Stephanie is my hero...and her whole little..."tonight you are going to be my bitch" line on RAW was awesome as hell...but please stop the pain with this Vince/Trish angle...its just disgusting...like Lewis says...its making him sterile...YUCK!!! The two matches are sort of tied together for me...but they were both really good...except of course for Austin coming in and interfering both times...but at least Kurt retained his belt...I was ecstatic about that...as I never thought that it would happen...So I don't know about the rest of you, but the match I want to see headline WM 17 is Kurt vs. Stone Cold. I have not seen anyone else (besides Benoit) who gets a better match out of Austin than Kurt...and that is what I want to see a great WRESTLING match as the Main Event to WM....I know it ain't happening, but a girl can dream...

The less I say about the Chyna/Ivory fiasco the better. Both things I thought was going to happen did...Ivory got killed (although ended up retaining her belt) and Steven got involved and ended up getting clocked for his troubles...I hate fake injury angles that are made to be real...this sucked...

Other Random thoughts:

I want to send my condolences to the Morley family on their recent loss...my thoughts are with you...

Haku...huh...well I think he fits well with Rikishi, we'll see how long I feel that way...

TEST IS THE NEW EUROPEAN CHAMP!!! I was very happy to see him win, esp. in such a decisive manner. I think that Test does have what it takes to be a real player, he just needs the right push...hopefully this will be what he needs...

I hope Regal gets better soon, his promo before his match with Test was simply hilarious..."disgusting specimen" indeed...

So Raven is with a woman...Sharon thinks its Tori...and I say please NO!!! I still think Lita would fit best with him, and then she would stop sucking all the heat away from the Hardys...mutually beneficial all around.

I am going to see a SCW show on Thursday...NC indy wrestling at its best...whoo hoo...

One more un-wrestling related comment: What the hell is up with Oz this season...why has Fontana put in two of the most unbelievable storylines ever into the plot line...let me just put it this way...Undertaker having super powers is more believable than the pill that ages people...please...

Ok, that all for me today...till next time...