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Rebecca Cerese

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REBECCA'S RANTS

Hey All! Is it just me or does time seem to fly by nowdays. I just remember writing my column, and boom its time once again for me to sit in front of my computer screen and shift through the latest offerings from the WWF, and if I have time the ECW, who this week in my humble opinion looked like a promotion in trouble. All I have to say is right now I am so happy I am a WWF mark instead of a WCW one. I usually don't give digs to the other promotion but they are in one sad state down south in Turnerland. What are those people thinking? I am so happy that Benoit, Malenko, Saturn and Guerrero were able to escape before it got any worse...and I would be hard pressed to see how it can get much worse than its been. And I have to say thank you to the WCW, because they gave us those 4 guys, just handed them over to the WWF, rather than make the legitimate changes that are needed in their booking committee. Well when we look at last night, and see Benoit getting a win over the Rock, and compare that to what Nitro served up on their unopposed night, it is easy to see who made the right choice and who didn't. Enough said.....

Now before I get to my thoughts on the special late night RAW, I want to first touch on a trend that I have discovered recently, which I really like, and that is online commentary from wrestlers on their official web pages. Now, I have no idea who did it first, or how long its been going on but I really appreciate an opportunity to get into these guys heads, and see what their thoughts are on different topic, wrestling or non-wrestling. By the way, anyone who has any info about who started all of this I would love to know! So email and tell me...thanks.

Anyway, I think the first one I read was Jericho's. Now Jericho has a really cool web site, which is very JERICHO. There is no other way to describe it. In his commentaries, he talks about his band, his movie pick of the week, and how he feels about the way things are going in the WWF. His commentaries are pretty fun to read, and while you are there you should check out his page, it really is quite original, plus he has a whole section on what he considers to be his best matches...and man there are a lot of them. Definitely worth checking out.

Since Perry Saturn has come to the WWF, I have read his latest commentaries as well. I really haven't checked out his web site so I can't make a comment on it, but his commentaries don't pull any punches to say the least. The first one I read talked about how ecstatic he was to be in the WWF and away from the WCW. His latest is a scathing put down of the least talented wrestler in the business today...Hulk Hogan. Really, if you already hate Hogan...Sam, I know you are reading...you must check it out. A description of this column really doesn't do it justice. I'll put it this way, its pretty obvious that Perry Saturn and a lot of other extremely talented individuals, have felt a lot of frustration for a long time due to the creative control and the power Hogan holds. I highly recommend this column, and Mr. Vince McMahon, if for some convoluted, drug induced reason you have ever in your mind considered for one millisecond taking back this power-crazed ego maniac, then I hope you go and read it too, because it seems that having Hogan in the locker room, or even in his own private locker room in the same building is nothing but a morale killer.

Another commentary I have been reading pretty regularly is Lance Storm's. Lance's web page is very professionally done with an excellent bio on him, along with pictures, and audio segments as well. I really like his commentaries a lot. He is very truthful in what he says, and he has a lot of respect for his fans, but doesn't take any shit. He also likes to recommend books and movies from time to time just like Jericho. Lance Storm's commentaries are much more down to earth though. He has openly discussed the problems the ECW are going through right now, and how he has faith that the ECW will pull through them, but he knows it is not going to be easy. Really good stuff from Lance, and he seems to try to answer all or most of the email he gets, either by addressing a situation in his commentary or by privately emailing people. He is also working on posting a workout regime which a lot of people seem to have requested. I can't imagine doing one of his workouts...the guy is in serious shape.

Now for my favorite commentary, I would have to go with Matt Hardy. He seems like the most genuinely sweet and down to earth guy you could ever want to meet, plus he is a serious Pearl Jam fan...can't go wrong there! His latest commentary is up at www.mattandjeffhardy.com. If you are a Hardys fan, you must check out this site. There are many excellent pictures form Matt and Jeff's private collection, including my personal favorite, Matt holding up the tag team tile belt which is strategically placed over his very unclothed body. Definitely a great picture! I have to say, every time I have read one of Matt's commentaries they have touched me in some way. A while back I went to the Unforgiven PPV, and I was horrified by how horrible some of the wrestlers...cough...X-Puke...cough....treated their fans. Matt addresses this in his latest commentary and has some really great things to say. Mostly, though he always tries to remind the fans out there that he is just a human being, trying to adjust to his life on the road, but the thing is, he also sees us his fans as human being as well, not as a nuisances who are just there to bother him. Yeah, he talks about how sometimes say when he is eating, he would rather not be bothered, but I think that anyone that would bother one of these guys at those inopportune times is in the wrong anyway. Anyway, before I just go on and on singing Matt's praises, you should just check it out for yourself. He really is a very inspirational writer, always attempting to see the positive in things, even when he gets injured or wakes up bruised and battered. Hell the guy wrote his latest commentary at 3:20am with an ice pack on his shoulder. Now that's dedication. Anyone that is that dedicated to his fans, deserves the same loyalty back...and besides, he is a damn great wrestler on top of all that. Oh yeah, just as a side note...him and Jericho have this pretty humorous rivalry thing going on in their commentaries. It all started over some documents Jericho carries around in his bag...weird stuff.

I just wanted to take the time to write about these commentaries, because I think it is really incredible that these guys take time out of their insane schedules to write a couple of notes to their fans. And it is really cool to get an inside perspective of what is going on in the wrestling world, even if it is a small glimpse.

Ok, enough of that, onto RAW thoughts...

One thing that struck me about RAW above anything else, was that most of the wrestlers seemed wiped out. After an insane weekend of house shows, and then the TV tapings, it seemed that some of the guys were really tired. The WWF is so successful right now, I really don't understand why they can't lighten the schedule just a little bit. Believe me, I understand and appreciate how important the house show is, but surely, no human being can keep up this pace for too long. If these guys are tired, they are more likely to get injured and nobody wants that! I mean Matt Hardy didn't even get to go home and nurse his separated shoulder...he instead worked house shows this weekend! But the Big Show gets the week off to go to Maui? What's up with that? Believe me, I am happy Big Show got some time off, and he came back with a new (much better) haircut, a new giant tattoo and a tan, but if he deserves a rest what about the Hardys or Christian and Edge. These four and others have worked a hell of a lot harder than Big Show...Where are their vacations? But I digress...

I did enjoy most of RAW, but I had to switch the channel everytime Mae and Mark Henry were on the screen. The only good part of these little skits was Jerry the King Laweler's reaction to them. I too was vomiting at home, so I was able to relate. Please get these two off of my TV already. It is an embarrassment. Please go away, please.

I know I touched on this last week, but I just want to quickly reiterate what a travesty of justice it is that D'Lo Brown is stuck being a f*cking pimp. I think the worst part of it is that D'Lo really seems to like it! I guess he is making the best out of a bad situation, but I hope he doesn't forget that he is better than this...oh so better than this...but I guess for now I am stuck with Pimp D'lo...YUCK!!!

What the hell is going on with Billy Gunn? The guy seems legitimately in some kind of a depression. Road Dogg had to accompany him to the ring last night, and offer him words of encouragement...how sweet it was to try and cheer up his man on Valentine's Day...but Billy looked like he wanted to be about anywhere but there. Maybe its because he knew he was about to job to Scotty too Hotty (couldn't have been to happy about that). But this withdrawn and depressed attitude has been going on for a while. Which leads me to the tag team titles. The Outlaws just need to drop the titles already. Its just not working anymore...I know the crowd still loves them, but that's because of their entrance mostly. People like to feel like they are part of something, that is why they like to sing a long with the Outlaws, or with the Rock. I know the WWF is in sort of a quandary concerning the NAO. They are probably the most over tag team of all time, and their merchandise sales are phenomenal, plus their whole gimmick is basically that they are the champs...."TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS OF THE WORLD"...., so the question arises, what the hell do you do with these guys if they are not the champs? Honestly I don't know. Singles competition didn't really work out for either of them, so what now? All I do know is that it is time for them to drop the belts NOW! There are so many other teams in the WWF right now that deserve to wear those belts more than the outlaws. I really hope the Dudleys are able to pick up the huge win at No Way Out and continue their excellent feud with my other two candidates for Tag Team Gold, the Hardys and Edge and Christian.

I really loved the triple threat match between, Jeff Hardy, Edge and D-Von Dudley on RAW. I especially like the double teaming with Christian and Matt Hardy on the outside during the match. Great fast paced action all around, and throw in a little tension, ok, a lot of tension between Edge/Christian and the Hardys, and you've got a very interesting situation. Hell, we haven't these four fight each other in a while. How about a #1 contenders match at No Way Out, and just let these four do what they do best...wow the crowd. And oh yeah, no tables...plenty of time for that when they take on the Dudleys for the belts...

I have a new hero, and her name is Amy Dumas...ok, Lita. She is the beautiful woman in red, doing those crazy highflying moonsaults. Damn, a woman, who is beautiful, doesn't act like a total skank, and has better moves than any other woman in the WWF. I like her and Papi Chulo's gimmick, it is original as hell, and fun to watch. Long live the light heavyweight championship belt! Good to see it back and off of Gillberg.

I don't understand what the WWF is doing with Tazz. He comes in, gets his ass kicked for almost the entire match, and then finally throws on the Tazzmission? I thought this guy is a killer, and bad, bad man as JR calls him, than why is he getting his ass kicked by Joey Abs for most of his match on Heat. If you are going to have him be a killer, he needs to act like one. He needs to come out and squash people like Joey Abs, and even Hardcore Holly. He certainly doesn't seem tough to me in his current state in the WWF.

Kurt Angle or Kirk Angle vs. Jericho...I like it. Angle delivered a killer promo, which actually set up a pretty logical rivalry with Jericho. I am looking forward to the build up to this match at the PPV. I certainly hope that the WWF do something to explain the connection between Jericho and Chyna. Now it just seems weird. Why is she with him? or better yet, why the hell didn't the camera man catch her awesome DDT of Angle onto the concrete. Even in replay, we only got a crappy camera angle. Can't wait to see what they do with these 3 on Smackdown.

Onto the FOUR....

It was great to see Eddy out of his cast so quickly, and acting the perfect heel. It is pretty obvious that all those guys are really great friends in real life, and I really like that. It was Malenko and Saturn's turn to have shit duty, when they were thrown into a handicap match against the monster Rikishi. I thought this was a great match, but I felt very sorry for both Dean and Perry for having their faces rubbed in Rikishi's giant ass. As Sharon wrote me earlier, I bet they rushed to the showers after that match...Gross. I must say, I was ecstatic when I heard Benoit was going to take on the Rock, because I knew the Rock would put him over, and he did. This was a great match, and I can just bet that this won't be the last time these two lock up! So Benoit is in the WWF 2 _ weeks and already he's faced HHH, Rikishi, and the Rock, not bad, not bad at all. To all those people out there who have been singing Benoit's praises for so long, I hovel for your forgiveness, as I didn't ever fully comprehend his greatness till now. But trust me I am fully aware now, and I hope that Benoit goes all the way in the WWF, and I have a good feeling he will.

Ok, onto KANE. Anyone that has been reading this column knows how much I love Kane, and how I have been begging and pleading to let him show his stuff and get him in the Main Event picture. Well, apparently, someone is listening to me, because, since he has returned with Paul Bearer, he is back to being the Big Red KICK ASS Machine. I'm surprised no one heard me screaming with glee, when last week on Smackdown, Kane tombstoned, sweet, virginal, virtuous, defenseless Tori, while X-Puke cried on the outside of the ring. (I gotta give credit here...X-Puke's look was priceless!) This week, he looked oh so impressive in the ring against Big Show and HHH together, and now, along with some help from the Rock gets the win, and a No Holds Barred Match against X-Puke at the PPV. Hopefully, this will finally bring some much needed closure to this storyline, as I was never happy with the way they "wrapped it up" last time. And of course my hope is that Kane will kick the crap out of X-Puke, and a little blading from X-Puke would be sweet as well, and then onto bigger and better things for Kane...like maybe HHH somewhere down the line.

Well, that's about if for the WWF, I just wanted to touch on a few things concerning Cactus Jack. I still am strongly opposed to the Hell in a Cell match for many reasons, despite Vince's reassurances that all necessary precautions will be taken to ensure Mick's safety. I still wish this wasn't happening, but after all of this, I am praying that this leads to Wrestlemania for Mick. He deserves to be there, he should be there, I really hope he will be there. Its the guys dream for god's sake. For everything he has given wrestling, I really hope wrestling gives this back to him.

One other note, I don't know what the hell Vince was thinking when he made those disparaging comments about Mick's wife, Collette. How dare he speak out against a woman who is legitimately concerned for her husband's safety. Money has nothing to do with it, and to compare her to Robin Givens was a crime against her. I rarely agree with Mark Madden, but I have to agree with his latest commentary on this situation. I really hope this was some kind of misquote or something, because if not...Shame on you Vince, shame on you.

Ok, I am too tired to talk about the ECW. Sorry. I do want to say that I was disturbed by how out of shape Raven was on TNN this weekend. The ECW definitely, as my friend Joe said, seemed like a promotion in trouble. They need to come up with a better game plan, and start putting the right people on TV. They need to remember who their healthy champ is right now, and put him on TV yesterday. They still have a lot of great performers, they just need to rethink some of their rivalries right now, since RVD is on the shelf. Ok, I am going to stop right now...

Thanks for reading, and as usual, any commentary is very welcome. See ya!

Rebecca Cerese
[slash] wrestling

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