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Rebecca Cerese

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REBECCA'S RANTS

Hey All! Its me, Rebecca back with my ever enthusiastic wrestling commentary. First off, I would like to thank all the people who responded to my columns. I can now say like our CRZ, our esteemed leader that "I GET LETTERS". On that note, following the onslaught of wonderful emails, I was unable to perform my duties last week, and crank out a column. I do have an excuse which is somewhat interesting and exciting...well maybe...so here it goes. I usually write my column on Tuesdays, but last Tuesday I was lucky enough to join my company and a video crew on a trip to Greensboro to commemorate the 40th Anniversary of the Civil Right Sit-Ins that started at a simple lunch counter in Woolworth's and spread throughout the South. It was truly an awe- inspiring day for me, as I was able to see real history in front of my eyes. The rest of the week, I was trying to catch up from both my missed day, and my missed week due to the snow storm. So I apologize, especially in light of the exciting as hell week in wrestling last week, with the arrival of the WCW 4 in the WWF, the injury to Eddie Guererro, and the general state of chaos in the ECW.

So onto the Rants:

What can I say about this week's RAW....WOW. Wrestling makes its way back to the WWF, and guess what the fans really seem to like it. It is really amazing how 4 men can have such an immediate impact on a wrestling promotion. Just two weeks ago, a main event like the one we witnessed on RAW would have never been possible in the WWF. I swear if the name Impact Players wasn't already taken, it would be very relevant here. Ok, I'll admit, not being a WCW fan at all, I was a little sick and tired of all the internet fans going on and on about Benoit. I never thought he sucked or anything, but I didn't fully understand all of the things he brings to the ring when he comes to wrestle.

To prove my point, one must only go back to Smackdown, and take a look at the match he got out of HHH, perhaps the weakest technical wrestler to ever grace a ring (well one of them anyway). Not only does Benoit himself look good, with his moves and all, but he makes his opponents look good as well. He elevates the stakes, and makes his opponent work that much harder. The result, one of the best matches I have ever seen HHH wrestle. All, I can say is damn I am impressed. Actually, I am impressed with all of these men. I have watched a lot of old ECW tapes, and have seen the great tag team of the Eliminators, and Perry Saturn was impressive as hell back then and continues to look impressive to me now. I have also seen the feud between Malenko and Guererro, and the technical mastery of these men is not to be taken lightly. It is a shame that Eddie had to get hurt, but thankfully the injury was not as serious as once thought, and he will be back in the ring in no time. However, one could tell by looking at his face that not being involved in the action is pure torture for him. He looked so depressed not being able to be part of the magic of that main event match.

Before I get to the Main Event, let me talk about the swerve...Man I did not see anything coming. When THE FOUR (I refuse to call them radicals) started beating down Cactus, my jaw dropped to the floor. I was flabbergasted. It was set up perfectly. I have realized something, I love heels, and as much as I love Foley, it was fun seeing him get beaten down by these guys. The crowd reaction was priceless too. It was like everyone in the arena had the same reaction as I did...Pure Shock. All in all, definitely one of my, "I love wrestling moments." Just to be fair, I want to offer a counter-response. I was thinking to myself, how can anyone not like this...but my co-worker Tom, with whom, I get into countless arguments...thought the WWF really dropped the ball on this one. He thinks that the FOUR are now just a sub-group of DX, who will be sent out there to do DX's dirty work. I guess he is right to some degree, it can play out that way, but I told him to be patient and see what happens next. Me, I just got caught up in the drama of the moment and went with it.

Side Note on the opening segment: Does anyone besides me think that a Hell in a Cell Match is a huge mistake? I mean lets be realistic, nothing can ever top the two falls from the cage of the original match, nothing, and to be honest, I wouldn't want to witness Foley attempting to top either of those stunts...so why this type of match? If he can't or shouldn't do anything to top it, why not just leave the fans remembering his first Hell in a Cell, the cornerstone of his legacy. To be honest, that match has been so hyped up, so re-played, that nothing could top it, so again, I will ask, why this type of match? It is a mystery to me, and I know I might sound like a wimp when I say this, but even the mere mention of Hell in a Cell and Foley in the same sentence makes me a little queasy. So I know I will be in the minority here, but I am not looking forward to this match at all...call me a wimp, but Foley has damaged himself enough to entertain us.

More on the Main Event coming up later....First, also on RAW.

Apparently , it was beat up women night on RAW.

Kurt Angle in the "you go boy" moment of the night takes the very obviously not pregnant Mae Young and drops her hard on her back. As much as I hate, and I repeat hate the Mae Young/Mark Henry storyline, and feel it needs to be removed from my TV yesterday, I gotta give Mae credit. She took that move like a champ, and it didn't look like Kurt softened the fall any. Kudos to Mae, now please get off my TV, and take over weight, under-talented Mark Henry with you.

Dare I say, we had a real women's match. Yes it was short, but it still consisted of two women who actually know how to wrestle, actually, well you know, wrestling. I was happy to see Jackie get some crowd reaction from her hometown. I was shocked to see Gangrel apply the Impaler, which Jackie sold like a champ. I did think it was kind of romantic the way Gangrel went after Jackie for Luna. Maybe an early Valentine's Day present?

Finally, we got the Busty Blonde EMT goes through a table spot...almost. Man, did Edge, Christian and the Hardy's get lost in the crowd or something, it really took them a long time to get there. It wouldn't surprise me if some women, tried to kidnap any of those guys on the way to the ring...wait, I shouldn't expose too much of my plan...but Bubbah Ray had to set up that move forever. I was like, wow, he is really savoring that moment. But the Damn Dudleys plan was foiled. No euphoric look from Bubbah Ray tonight.

Speaking of the Dudleys, I just want to take this moment to tell the world, how much I love these guys. The more sick and twisted they get, the more I love it. It doesn't hurt that they are ensconced in this totally kick ass rivalry with not one but both of my other favorite tag teams in the WWF, hmm, who could that be, the Hardys, and Edge and Christian. Its great to see the Hardys starting to get some of the recognition they deserve. And, yes there were some cheers for my underdog Christian as well, of course they were quickly drowned out by the squeals for Edge, but they were there, really they were...hmm, maybe those were my own screams....But I must say, that Edge and Christian looked very impressive against the Outlaws. Hey Heather, I know they will always be your boys, but I cannot wait for them to drop the titles already. Allow me to plead my case for a second. I think that the Hardys deserve the belts the most, but I also think that Christian and Edge have been busting their asses for over six months in the tag team division, looking impressive against all they have faced. And esp. if the WWF is going to give Edge a singles push sometime in the future, my boy Christian will have much more credibility if all of his hard work as a tag team wrestler finally paid off with tag team gold. At least give him that...

Ok, back to the Hardys. I know I sound like a broken record already, but I really want the Hardys to take at easy. I am not saying not to be Xtreme or anything, but they shouldn't have to go through tables every night of the week, to get a crowd reaction. They are setting a pace for themselves that no human being can keep up with, and I truly worry for their safety. I don't want to see one of them injured before the year's over. They also can fall into the trap of (as my friend Lewis says) being pigeon holed into a certain type of match, and have that style take over their characters and careers. A perfect example of this is New Jack. The guy started doing his garbage/plunder matches, and now that is all the crowd will pop for. Of course the main difference is New Jack has no talent, and the Hardys, after the falls through the tables and the crazy bumps are over, have bucketfuls of talent. Hell, I was popping huge for them even when they were just doing their normally incredible moves. I am not saying the table diving doesn't have a place, but it should be a special occasion, not the norm. I know, I once again sound like a wimp, but the truth be told, below this layer of blood lust lies a woman who doesn't want to see anyone get seriously injured while entertaining me.

Other observations:

Why the hell is D'Lo a f*ck'n pimp. Excuse the language, but this little gimmick change truly pisses me off. First off, its not even original, the WWF already has one pimp, and in my humble opinion, one is already too many, but now poor D'Lo is stuck with this recycled crappy gimmick. D'Lo is a major talent, who should be in a rivalry with Jericho for the IC belt. Hell, remember their awesome match up on Heat all those months ago. Good stuff, but instead he is chomping on cigars, tag teaming with the no-talent Godfather and being escorted to the ring by skanky women. I will say it again, what a waste. Please get D'Lo out of this ASAFP (as soon as f*ck'n possible).

Speaking of Jericho, the Ayatollah of Rock n' Rollah looked a little out of his flow on RAW. I don't think I like his pairing with Chyna, although, he looked a little lost without her. On the subject of Chyna, I have to say, I hate that Bazooka o' fireworks she now come out with. It is cheesy and horrible. The 9th wonder of the world can certainly do better than that. Let me re-phrase, its not that I don't like her pairing with Jericho, it just seems that Jericho doesn't seem very into it, and therefore, it doesn't work very well. I am curious to see where the WWF is going with their "relationship". Perhaps we will find out on Valentine's Day.

With the FOUR making their way to the WWF, the forgotten one seems to be Tazz. I kind of feel sorry for him, as his debut has been completely overshadowed by the crazy invasion of the WCW four. Plus, I was hoping the WWF would use him similarly to the way that Paul E used him in ECW, as a destructive machine. The few matches I have seen, haven't really allowed Tazz to showcase his talents, namely suplexing people from very strange positions. His first match at the Rumble was able to accomplish this, but after that nothing. In his squash of the Mean Street Posse, not one suplex was used. What's up with that? I still haven't forgotten the kick ass suplex he delivered to RVD at this past November to Remember when he caught RVD by the leg, and lifted him up that way, truly a holy shit moment! But more on ECW later. Get this guy away from Angle, and let him get some convincing wins under his belt. The promo was definitely a step in the right direction. As usual the production was stellar.

And now, finally the Main Event. I have never in my life, gotten so excited during a wrestling match where I wasn't in attendance, as I did for Raw's Main Event. It was perfect. I knew Rikishi was going to come out, but I didn't know Too Cool would be with him. Since when is the worm so over? I mean on Heat it received the same reaction, people were acting it out along with Scotty to Hotty, and popping big time for it. I am glad to see Too Cool getting over though, as they are really good workers, and hilarious to boot. Hats off to Pat Patterson, who I just bet had a say in how the match would work itself out in the ring. It worked out great.

Personal highlights for me included:

Rikishi's super kick over the Rock into HHH's face as he was attempting a pedigree

Benoit's equally impressive...check that...mind blowing suplex of Rakishi!

The Rock breaking up the broncobuster with a vicious clothesline.

The fast paced, and exciting flow of the match in general, was great to behold. That along with the tag-in sequences just had the crowd in attendance and me watching at home, going completely berserk.

Of course my major highlight came after the match was over and done with, and that was when the lights went down, and Paul Bearer came out on the ramp, followed by the freshly released from being institutionalized, new and improved Big Red Machine Kane. Seeing him realigned with Paul Bearer makes me think,(hope and pray) that perhaps Kane is going to get the push that he so rightfully deserves. At least he is free of that skank, Tori, who looks very comfortable near disgusting X-Puke. If you ask me those two were made for each other! Upon his entrance, Kane proceeded to kick the ass we all know he is capable of kicking, and everyone went down. I read that after the show, Kane even wowed the crowd (well sorta) with his version of the People's Elbow. Man, I wish I could have seen that. As well, it appears that Cactus pulled out some of his Dude Love moves and cut a rug with Rikishi and company. Wish I could have seen that too.

All in all, I haven't gotten that excited over a wrestling match in a while. I think the last time it happened in the WWF was the ladder match at No Mercy. All in all, an excellent end, which will definitely keep me coming back for Smackdown.

Now a few quick notes on ECW.

ECW on TNN was seriously lacking something this week, although I still enjoyed it. When I read about Hardcore TV, I was drooling with envy, as I don't get that show. It seems that Paul E. put the good matches on that show, and left us with Dusty Rhodes and Dreamer against Corino and Rhino. As every week passes, it is more and more evident that Tommy Dreamer should no longer be in the ring. He was never a great worker, but with his serious injury, it is flat out painful to watch him wrestle. Dusty Rhodes just scares me. Rhino needs better competition than this, that's for sure.

Where are the Impact Players? Where's Tajiri? Why isn't Raven wrestling, instead of whining?

The ECW really need these guys, esp. with their big name, RVD out for at least the next 3 months with a broken ankle, and their other big name, Sabu defecting to the WCW. I can kind of understand why Sabu wants to leave, but personally, I think it sucks. Suddenly the anglel that Paul E has been building over the last couple of weeks has lost two of its main players. So we need an alternative Main Event on the PPV, and some wrestlers to step in and make an impact.

Now is the time Raven needs to step up, and elevate, if he can, to the next level. I know he can do it, he just needs to stop whining.

I really wish Jerry Lynn wasn't hurt. He could really step into this situation and run with it.

Get the Impact Players on TV. They are too good, to just be cutting half ass promos in a hot tub. Get Lance Storm back where he belongs, in the ring.

All, in all, although I am worried about the ECW, I have a good feeling that Paul E will be able to come up with ways to deal with all these problems that have suddenly arisen in his company.

Well, thanks once again for coming along for the ride, and listening to my small thoughts on my favorite subject. As usual, I would love to hear from you, so I can continue to say "I GET LETTERS". See ya!

Rebecca Cerese
[slash] wrestling

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