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Alex Carnevale

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TOP TEN BITS

In honor of my tenth column here at [slash], I plan to begin demanding I go over other wrestlers.

10. If anyone is Hogan 2001, it's Stone Cold Steve Austin. I have nothing against Austin, first of all. I like the way his character has developed recently, he always works hard in the ring, and he deserves all the success he has had. All I want to say is that others have perhaps used their success to greater advantage to the company. And I realize Austin catapulted the WWF to where it is, but I have to insist he's hurting it now.

Let's see what HHH and Rock did after winning their WWF Titles. HHH won his first WWF Title from Mick Foley on RAW. He feuded with Steve Austin first, to give him credibility. Austin had to job at that time because he had a severe injury and needed surgery. HHH feuded with Mick "I'll job, where?" Foley to give him further credibility. He then feuded with the number one guy in the business, and lost the WWF Title. After losing the WWF Title, he immediately reached out to the undercard and started giving guys the rub. Chris Benoit, Chris Jericho, and most of all, Kurt Angle, were brought to new levels of superstardom by the very fact that HHH was willing to work with them, and in Jericho and Angle's case, job to them.

The Rock? He won the WWF Title after feuding with HHH during the summer. He feuded immediately afterwards with Mick "I'd love to job, Vince" Foley to gain credibility. He did the job at WrestleMania XV to Austin, and afterwards, he did it again at Backlash. After Austin jobbed to Taker, he fought Taker at KOTR, he feuded with Billy Gunn. I repeat, he feuded with Billy Gunn. At the second biggest show of the year, where Austin was wrestling for the WWF Title, the Rock fought Billy Gunn. Then, he feuded with The British Bulldog. At WWF No Mercy, the Rock fought the British Bulldog. He worked with two of the most useless lumps in wrestling at this point, and got them over. After a WWF Title match at Survivor Series, where he did the job to the Big Show, Rock formed a tag team with Mick Foley that only served to get him more over than he was before. He scored the highest rating in the history of RAW. He jobbed to the Big Show at No Way Out, and at WrestleMania he jobbed to HHH. After winning the title at Backlash with Austin's help, he put over Chris Benoit and he put over Kurt Angle clean for the WWF Title at No Mercy, something HHH was clearly not willing to do.

But both men aren't as bad as Austin. After Austin won the WWF Title at WM XIV, I can't remember one meaningful feud he had with an undercard wrestler. He wouldn't wrestle Jarrett, so Jarrett went to WCW. He got put over at every PPV, and never jobbed. Every time Austin has been on television since he won the title, he has been all about the title. The only time this wasn't the case was his "feud" with Rikishi, and we all know where that went. Austin wouldn't even give the guy a good match - he squashed him, and left UT to try to get Rikishi over at Armageddon. He wouldn't put over Angle on RAW when there was no reason he shouldn't have. He wouldn't put over HHH at Survivor Series. He hasn't worked a program or treated as a serious opponent Chris Benoit, Chris Jericho, or Kurt Angle. When Austin came back from his injury, he immediately supplanted the company's top babyface, and looks to be going over him at WM X-SEVEN even when a heel turn would save the company. But Austin won't turn heel. His merchandise sales are too high. He may be sacrificing the company for his popularity at this point Unfortunately, the two are irrevocably intertwined. If Austin turns heel, I will eat my words.

9. The weird thing about Benoit's career is that he's never had a ***** singles match. Some might rate the Kevin Sullivan brawl that high, but it's absurd to do so. His matches with Jericho never got that high, he couldn't do it with HHH or Rock, he never wrestled Foley, Austin, or Shawn to any considerable degree. I'm aware star ratings are bullshit, but it's still true he hasn't been able to put together that ONE career defining match. I hope he is in singles for WrestleMania, because I think that might be his chance to put together that kind of effort. He simply hasn't been given the time to do it, I think.

8. Let me just say something about star ratings for a second. I try not to use star ratings as a criticism of the match. I certainly think they can be somewhat useful in comparing one match to another, especially another one that occurred at the same event or on the same card, or between the same opponents. They are also useful in conveying to the reader quickly how I felt about a particular match. Of course, they tend to mean nothing as to how effective an angle or a match's storyline was told. Virtually everyone deducts for interference and the like, but is a clean finish always the best thing? For instance, if Austin hadn't interfered in HHH's match at the Royal Rumble, would that have made it a more *exciting* match? I don't think so. I think Austin's appearance was a welcome addition to the angle, no pun intended.

7. Quite possible my favorite way of getting a wrestler over is having a stable. It's one of Russo's favorite tricks, and I've always liked the idea of it. When I saw X-Pac return in the Radz-Hardyz six man (ugh) on RAW, I really thought that Waltman was going to join the Radicalz. For a second, I believed that Polaco wasn't going to form the tag team with no workrate. How wrong I was. I couldn't even stand the two of them in the same ring together. One more segment every RAW that I don't have to watch, I guess.

6. They have loooong matches on Nitro. Don't get me wrong, Nitro was nothing special. In fact, I had to stop watching Dustin Rhodes v. Rick Steiner because it was so horrible, but the matches do seem to be getting longer. For instance, Kidman v. Skipper was excellent, and I especially enjoyed the Palumbo-Stasiak match. Both were fairly good TV stuff, especially considering the matches on RAW are getting shorter and shorter especially for the main.

5. When did the WWF become WCW? And I mean specifically that I feel like so many angles are being shoved down my throat in the most deliberate, obvious way possible. I mean, do storylines progress? After fifteen fucking weeks of Vince McMahon calmly placing his penis in Trish Stratus' vaginal canal, I "get it." It's WWF Attitude, right? When Vince says he and Trish are just friends, I'm in on the joke. THEY'RE HAVING SEX AHAHAHAHA! I *understand.* Hunter IS the fucking cerebral assassin. Who is the driver of Raven's goddamn car? Oh tell me please! The casual fan is tuning out because the WWF is underestimating EVERYONE'S INTELLIGENCE.

4. Where's Test and that Euro title they put on him so quick? Wouldn't Regal be better off with it right now?

3. The only way Al Snow will get over is if he dresses up like Mick Foley for every match, takes a bump off a plane to the ground, and works a program with The Rock simultaneously. This is what Mick was talking about when he said he would hurt his value as a wrestler if he stayed in WCW. If only wrestling right now weren't the WWF, period. Sigh.

2. I guess Raven has thrown his entire WCW and ECW character that has got him over throughout his career out the fucking window. Think of all the guys who jumped from ECW and just lost the grasp of their character. That shows you Paul Heyman's biggest strength: characterization. Stevie Richards: went to the WWF, lost it, changed gimmick. Tazz: went to the WWF, tried to stay with the same gimmick, totally changed good gimmick. Shane Douglas: went to WWF, changed gimmick, didn't get over, went back to ECW to original gimmick, was over, went to WCW, changed character, isn't over. The only guys who have gone and succeeded are the ones that didn't change the character. The Dudleyz toned their character down and made themselves reliable babyfaces, Jericho stayed with the same character that he had created.

1. Superbrawl: Revenge Preview - card is courtesy wcw.com:

Sunday, Feb. 18, 2001 at 8 p.m. ET
Municipal Auditorium in Nashville, Tennessee

For The World Heavyweight Title: Kevin Nash v. Scott Steiner (with Midajah)

This feud has been developed admirably. The match will probably suck, but it shouldn't be too horrible, because Nash should step it up a bit. I expect a lot of interference in this one, and perhaps a surprise return for somebody to pave the way for Nash, but any way you look at it, Steiner retains. * to **1/2

Jeff Jarrett v. Diamond Dallas Page

These two usually have good matches with each other. The triple cage for the World Title was decent and their straight match was as good, if not better. I expect a *** match here, with Kanyon interference paving the way for a Jeff Jarrett win. For The Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. v. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

This should be a good match. ****, I'm hoping, which would be the first four star match on WCW PPV in a long, long time.

For The Commissionership: Lance Storm v. The Cat. Cat like a true babyface, goes over for the commissionership that he lost. I like the Cat, and I hope this match is good for both men's sake. ***, tops. Probably more like **.

For The U.S. Title: Dustin Rhodes v. Rick Steiner.

This is the primary reason I won't pay money to buy this PPV. Whoever conceived of this match should be shot and killed. DUD, bordering on negative stars, much like their horrific Nitro "brawl." Steiner retains. Lot of that happening, that's probably why they did the commissionership switch.

For The Tag Team Titles: Mark Jindrak and Shawn Stasiak v. Sean O'Haire and Chuck Palumbo

This should be a whipass match featuring the good, young, big workers of WCW and I am jacked to see if they can step outside the formula. Champs retain, *** minimum. These fellas can go.

Totally Buff v. KroniK

I'm glad these fuckers are staying out of the rest of the card. If we see the Super Blockbuster my time spent watching this will be worthwhile. At best, it'll be a decent power match. They have incentive to outwork the younger kids with the titles, and maybe Adams will kick it up a notch. Probably not, *. Oh, by the way, *No Substitutions Allowed In This Match.

The only other match is the cruiserweight opener which should be good and pointless in a not-sexual kind of way. I will enjoy it. Stars all around, hey! I won't be buying this but if I get Brad to tape it and it's not a bad show, I'll review it.



I said I'd get to the Iron Man matches, but it's taking me longer than I thought to get through them because I like to sit down and watch in one viewing. So those are coming. In the meantime, the match that is both Shawn and Mick Foley's second best match of all time. Few people have seen it, but it's from WWF IYH: Mind Games. The pay-per-view itself sucked, I'm informed, but it featured Mick Foley's second best match in my opinion (behind the crazy and nearly perfect Royal Rumble brawl), as well as the establishment of a WWF main event style that is utilized to this day.

I think the lack of the finish kills this match dead in terms of historic value, but its impact was felt more strongly than any Michinoku Pro ten man or ECW lucha stuff could. The Iron Man contest was no doubt match of the year for 1996. The top five probably would go like this for 1996:

1. Bret Hart v. Shawn Michaels (3-31-96)
2. Mankind v. Shawn Michaels (9-22-96)
3. Ultimo Dragon v. Shinjiro Ohtani (8-4-96)
4. One of the big All Japan tag matches - pick one
5. Diesel v. Shawn Michaels (4-28-96)

The top ten WWF singles matches in Shawn's career go like this: 10. Steve Austin v. Shawn Michaels (WWF WrestleMania XIV)
9. Marty Jannetty v. Shawn Michaels (WWF RAW 1993)
8. Jeff Jarrett v. Shawn Michaels (WWF IYH 2)
7. Bret Hart v. Shawn Michaels (Survivor Series '92)
6. Diesel v. Shawn Michaels (WWF IYH: Good Friends, Better Enemies)
5. Razor Ramon v. Shawn Michaels (WWF Summerslam '95)
4. The Undertaker v. Shawn Michaels (WWF IYH: Badd Blood)
3. Razor Ramon v. Shawn Michaels (WWF WrestleMania X)
2. Mankind v. Shawn Michaels (WWF IYH: Mind Games)
1. Bret Hart v. Shawn Michaels (WWF WrestleMania XII)

This is in Philly, so there are infrequent but audible ECW chants.

Mankind v. Shawn Michaels, WWF Title. Foley with an elbow to start, and he takes the devastating left boot to Shawn's face. Ross is so superior on commentary. Big backdrop, and the Cactus clothesline takes them out of the ring. Foley kicks Shawn to the rail, and pulls up the mats, only to get dropkicked back on the concrete. Shawn goes to the top and comes off with a plancha onto Mankind, onto the concrete. Shawn comes off and slams Foley's head to the concrete. What a senseless bump. Shawn comes off the top with a flying double axehandle, and Shawn starts pounding on Foley. Clothesline and a scoop slam sets up the flying elbow. He motions for the superkick, but Mankind wisely escapes from the ring. Paul Bearer gives him the urn and he rocks back and forth with it. Don't even ask. They have a neat camera angle from the post that shows Shawn coming off with the elbow. Foley goes back in the ring, and pounds on him in the corner before Shawn pulls the old switcheroo and whips Foley to the corner. It has no effect, and they slug it out. Shawn pounds on him, and tries a snapmare, but Mankind brings him back into a choke. Foley is screaming as he tries for the mandible claw. Shawn kicks Foley right in face. Finally, Mankind brings Shawn down, and takes him out of the ring. He takes the Spanish commentary table out at a slant, but Shawn jumps on him and smashes him into a casket. He then suplexes Mankind's knee on the stairs. Jesus. Mankind gets back in, but Shawn goes after the knee. Foley is now on top of the casket, and Shawn smashes his knee against that.

He brutalizes the knee, as I finally realize that it's Hennig as the third man on commentary. Shawn even hits Hebner when he stop him from beating on Foley's knee. Foley's knee is shot, but he comes back with blows to the face. He kicks Shawn with the injured leg and sells it. Shawn whips out the dragon screw legwhip, and moves into the figure four. For the life of me, I have no idea why Shawn is wrestling like a heel. It's a great part of the match story; it's just a little weird to see. When he played heel in later days, it was cowardly heel, not vicious like he is here. Near the end of his career the heel stuff was again, cocky, not brutal, HHH-heel. Foley turns the figure four, but then Shawn DROPKICKS the knee hard, bending it all sorts of ways and applies a "version" of the Canadian Maple Leaf. Foley gets to the rope. Shawn moves a crucifix into sunset flip, which I've never seen, for two. Shawn tries a rana but Mankind turns it into a stungun. Mankind stabs himself with a pen to get the feeling back in the knee. Ross somehow gets it over; only he could.

Foley comes back in and chokes Shawn on the ropes. Mankind slaps his knee to be able to stand. Way to sell the psychology, Mick. Mankind batters Shawn in the corner, and Mankind gives him that running knee to the face. Nasty stuff. This match is probably the stiffest WWF main event in history. Mankind whips out the half-bulldog. It's kind of funny that Mick Foley has won the WWF Title, and Curt Hennig never did. If Curt had been WWF champion - which he might have been has Flair never come to the WWF - he'd have a job with WCW or WWF right now. Probably the former. "HBK" chant, as Shawn picks it up with a belly-to-back suplex.

Mankind takes over with a headbutt, but Shawn slips around him like an eel; but then he takes the HBK bump to the corner up to the top turnbuckle, back down into the tree of woe. Mankind drops an elbow. Seamless, amazing, logical sequence. Another elbow continues the assault. Mankind drops a neat legdrop and they both stagger to their feet. Meticulous pre-match planning here is apparent from both sides. Mankind tosses Shawn into a nice bump, and he follows it up on the outside but goes knee-first into the steps. Ugh. Shawn drop-toeholds him into the steps. Lord have mercy on Mick's soul. One of my favorite sequences occurs with Foley on the apron and Shawn on the ropes. They try to suplex each other, and Foley brings him up but Shawn stand on the apron. Foley charges at Shawn but goes right into the post. Just beautiful. A few elbows from HBK lead to a powerslam for two. Ross sells the match like nobody's business. Mankind gets caught in hangman's noose, but catches Shawn with the mandible claw. Just glorious. Mankind drops out, and picks up the mandible claw outside the ring. They brawl over the Spanish announce table, and Shawn picks up a chair. In a moment that reminds me of the part in Funk v. Flair where Ric alternates chopping Terry and kicking at the knee, Shawn bashes Mick's mandible claw hand, his leg, and then his hand again. Brutal. Shawn rolls in, and drag Mankind in with him. He takes him over and smashes Mick's hand to the canvas. He then steps on Foley's hand.

He then PUNCHES at Mick's hand, and then at his face. Shawn is playing total heel, here. He steps on Mick's hands (in the plural), and argues with the ref. Mick sells the hand, even though I imagine that tough to do. Shawn charges Mick and takes his usually spectacular bump over the top rope. Mankind drops an amazing Cactus elbow running off the apron. Mankind slides out and administers a vicious swinging neckbreaker on the concrete. Mick legdrops Shawn's head back in, and follows that up with the double-arm DDT (which, incidentally, Hudson called Buff's version of it a Kobashi DDT. Kind of pointless - what audience does that appeal to? None?) for two. The wicked pulling piledriver for two, twice. A neat little pick up cradle gets two. Mankind rolls to the outside, frustrated, and throws two chairs into the ring. He attempts to rolls Shawn into the casket, but a slugfest erupts, and Shawn hits flying clothesline back in the ring. He stomps a mudhole in Mankind. Scoop slam and top rope bodypress for two. Shawn goes to the top but Foley falls into the ropes and crotches him. Mankind then calmly belly-to-backs Shawn through the Spanish announce table. Vince goes over and checks on them. Sick, sick, sick, sick bump, especially from Shawn. Mankind comes back into the ring with a chair. He climbs the top roe, but Shawn jumps up on another chair set up in the ring and hits the superkick on to the chair. Badass. Half kickout, and then Vader comes in for the DQ at 27:34 and gets his clock cleaned. Paul Bearer docks Shawn one with the urn. Sid comes out and fights Vader, as I yawn. Then, Foley gets the mandible claw, but in a cool moment, Paul Bearer opens the casket, and Undertaker is in there. He cleans house and chases Mankind down the aisle.

You know, it's wasn't that the screwjob was that bad, because Shawn virtually has the three count, and for all intents and purposes, another superkick is all it would have taken to make the match what it is anyway, a ***** classic. Oh, and the match is really, really long. It's too bad these guys never met again, but maybe at WrestleMania X-SEVEN, right? Right? There are going to put two guys that haven't wrestled in one and three years at the biggest show of the year, right? Wrong.

One interesting thing that I've noticed after watching this match and the Iron Man match is that Shawn and Bret combined were about as over as Rock or Austin. It was a different time, to be sure, and wrestling hadn't boomed, but I wonder if Michaels can ever get as over as Jericho once he comes back to the WWF - and by that token, is his time as a main eventer over?



Before I ever saw the Benoit v. Jericho match they had in the J-Cup, I was extremely psyched to see the match. It seemed like an instant classic, it seemed like the great match that I had to see t appreciate its brilliance. I wasn't right, but I wasn't wrong.

Chris Benoit v. Chris Jericho. Jericho says, "C'mon motherfucker," and they roll around. An actual slapfest erupts, and Benoit slaps on a rear chinlock. He then turns it into a surfboard stretch. They turn it around, and Jericho tries for a pin. They move into the test of strength spot, with both men making absurd groaning noises. Benoit's stronger, so he pushes down for two. Jericho tries a sunset flips from that position., but it gets nothing. Stalling vertical suplex for two. Rear chinlock from Jericho as apparently Benoit deciding to teach him transitions. He would forget everything he learned in the Pegasus' classroom shortly thereafter. Scoop slam and slingshot body press for two, and then Jericho reapplies the headlock. Jericho talking is pretty funny throughout the match. Pegasus counters with a high angle belly to back and the snap suplex for two. Pegasus clothesline gets two. Backbreaker, and Benoit stretches into into an improvisational submission maneuver. Nasty looking Lion Tamer follows. Pegasus misses a dropkick, and Jericho sentons on him quickly for two. Clothesline and "c'mon baby" pin for two. Whip to the corner, and a dropkick, as he chops Benoit in the corner. Benoit turns it around by clotheslining him and whipping him to the ropes, Jericho comes off with a moonsault press but Benoit moves out of the way. Knee to the gut spot lets Benoit retake control as Jericho is a tad tired. Suplex on the ropes. Jericho on the apron, and Benoit tries to take him in the hardway, but Jericho counters with a spinning heel kick, a suplex on the ropes, and the springboard dropkick. Insane springboard moonsault plancha gives Jericho a "Lionheart" chant. They both go to the top rope, and Benoit - as he always seems to do - counters a super belly to back suplex into a bodypress for two. Jericho has no fucking luck with that move. Powerbomb for two Near fall sequence moves into a dragon suplex from Benoit for two. Scoop slam, but the flying headbutt misses, and Jericho covers for two. Jericho hits a foldover tigerbomb for two. Jericho tries a suplex, but Benoit flips over and belly-to-backs him out of the ring. Benoit dashes outside with a tope, and it's a brutal one. Jericho comes back in, and Benoit tries to kill him with a powerbomb. Jericho flips out of it, and goes around, and cinches Benoit for the tiger suplex. Jericho can't hold onto it, so the ref doesn't complete the count. Jericho brings Pegasus up, and whips out a fisherman's buster. He goes for the second rope moonsault but lands on his feet. Rana roll-up gets two. Spinning heel kick gets up the moonsault to Benoit's back. He moves Benoit over into an amateur style cradle and bridges for two. To the top rope, and Benoit brings him off with what some have described as a second rope tombstone piledriver, but what I will describe as "falling on him." This, interestingly enough, gets the three count for the Wild Pegasus victory. ****1/4 Ê

I didn't care for Benoit v. Jericho at Judgment Day, which I thought was about ****. The Backlash match was as good as the Japan match, but I thought they really topped themselves with 2/3 Falls. The ladder match was my favorite of the series, but it's obviously hard to compare it to the others.

That's all for today I guess. Next week: top ten PPVs of all time. Write me an e-mail at gould41@aol.com, I'll write back.

Alex Carnevale
[slash] wrestling

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