Greetings sports entertainment fans! It is I, the Lady Guinivere of the Knights of the Roundtable-the Oracles! I know some of you out there wonder 'why should I listen to some girl's opinions about a MAN's sport like wrestling?' Well, I know I'm just a girl, all cute and clad in pink *batting my eyes* but I do have some opinions. Oh, enough of this teasing, let's get on the edge!

Welcome back, Michelangelo! And wow, what a sweet deal that sounded like! He did a good recap of KOTR on-site, but Martin truly proved how Marvellous he is in his recap, check it out!

Now, let me do some shilling for a friend-if you're into hot men (the Hardies, Edge & Christian) or odd ones ( Mideon, Prince Albert) head on over to hmow.com-Hellfire's Hot Men of Wrestling! It's a great website-check it out! Another great female-run site, BridesofKane.net-run by the ever cool Storm. It's a real fan-friendly site, full of fan art, photos (hey my nephew's there, dressed as Kane!) and my personal favorite, fan fiction.

Here's personal confession-I've gotten hooked on fan fiction, even the slash ones. You know what slash ones are, don't you? They're gay love stories starring your favorite wrestlers! (You're welcome) I'm just fascinated by what would possess you to look at, say, Undertaker and Jericho and picture them together like that. I've heard of writing your fantasies down and you know, picturing yourself in love with your favorite celebrity but picturing them gay just seems odd. (Not that there's anything wrong with that) Well anyway............

I guess the general consensus around the Net is that KOTR..er...lacked something. Well, after I saw Benoit lose to Rikishi, I was a little deflated. Then seeing Crash squeak out a victory over Bull was strange and seeing Eddy lose just really left me feeling..blah.. Once Benoit was out of the running, I knew Kurt Angle would be the KOTR 2000 but you know what? It suits him-first he went around bragging about his gold medals now, as seen on RAW, this King thing has really swelled that head.

And even though seeing the DX trio go through a table was satisfying-it was a hollow victory after seeing the Dudleys lose AGAIN!! How is it they can beat everyone else but when it comes to DX, they get their asses handed to them? Oh wait, that's right, Xpot has friends in HIGH places. Good thing I'm not in Tori's place-when he did that astounding stupid gallop he does before the bb, I'd trip him! Leave him laying flat in the ring-God, what a prat he is!!!!! I'm sorry, he just annoys me to no end! Wait-what am I apologizing for? There aren't many Xpot fans on this board-we have taste!

Speaking of taste-just what the hell was the point of that evening gown hardcore match? It didn't serve as comic relief-you have to be FUNNY to do that! Jay-hovah, please! Maybe Vince knew he was in trouble for that match alone, that's why he's off tv for now. I remember him saying that the Thanksgiving gravy women's match was the worst thing he put on tv-no, I think it was this pointless drag queen match. You finally get Mae off tv and here come the Stooges! And D'Lo's in the back- WHY?????

I wasn't even psyched to see the Rock win-as much as I love the caramel God that he is. I went the obvious route and figured HHH would cheat, win and end up facing Kurt. But actually, the storyline that seems to be developing might be better-HHH still has to face Kurt in hopes of being the #1 contender. I'm not sure where this UT/Kane pairing is headed but after the success of the Rock and Sock Connection, it's not necessarily a bad thing. I'd hate to see them with the tag belts though. I'm still betting on seeing the Hardys get them at SummerSlam-where Rebecca, Heather and I will be screaming our lungs out!

I must say I'm very impressed with T&A, they're shaping up to be brawlers like the APA. Even Trish is getting that heel manager act down ( but I have to concur with Cyan, she does look..odd and her breasts ARE very shiny! There's something wrong in that) That powerbomb she took from Chyna looked really brutal! I have to give it to her-the girl can take bumps! (And stinkfaces too!) I don't understand why she would come down to face Lita in those heels, though-they don't look conducive to doing any real moves.(But that's just my fashion police opinion)

I got to watch some of that tape I received from Spartan (Iron Chef Louisiana!) and let me tell you, seeing Dean Malenko and Eddy Guerrero in their early ECW matches was impressive as hell! You want to talk wrestling clinics? It made me wonder when ECW became all about crazy bumps, chair shots and suicidal dives. These guys were doing real mat wrestling and the crowd was into it! As a matter of fact, at their last match for ECW, the crowd was chanting 'please don't go!' which was a real testament to the impact those two had.

I also got to see the ECW debut of Psichosis and a 20 year old Rey Mysterio Jr! It was true lucha libre at its finest, let me tell you. I'm in the middle of a Rey vs. Juventud Guerrera spotfest-they were amazing too! So again I have to thank Ryan for this tape! Speaking of tapes (and stuff), I have to send out props to my Dudley sister, Rebecca, for sending me a Best of HBK tape and The Dynamite Kid's book! When I got into the WWF, Shawn was gone so aside from a few tapes I'd rented, I never really saw him action. So I'm looking forward to watching that tape. I've started the Kid's book and will probably do a review in a future column. (It's good so far!)

Random Thoughts

• So what's the story with the Headbangers? Chazz looked adorable on Heat and I see he's teaming up with D'Lo on Smackdown. They also call him 'Chazz' so it looks like the moshing is over.

• Mick as the Commish is very cute and it's good to see him back!

• What is with all this Terri & Kat stuff?

• How depressing was it to see there were legitimate women wrestlers in the back (Jacky & Ivory) while the Stooges were fighting in the women's dressing room?

• Off topic-I am SO there for the X-men movie! Can't wait! Wish Bishop had made it in but hopefully he and Gambit will be in the next.

• Oh I almost forgot-Chris Key got my vague reference in my last column- It was SNL's Mike Meyers as Linda Richman in Coffee Talk.

Until next time................

Sharon
First Lady of the Oracles
[slash] wrestling